Blind jokes
An 80-year-old blind man asks his grandson, "Can you grab my glasses?"
Then the grandson says, "Did you get in the flour again?"
Grandpa said, "No, it was the weed."
What happened to the blind man's son?
He thought he was hitting a piñata.
Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.
What does the blind, deaf child get for Christmas?
Cancer.
A blind old guy asked me if I had any money to spare. I laughed and said I had a gold tooth.
I don't have any now.
Why did the kid who was blind, in jail, need light to see? He didn't, he needed to braille his way out.
This is really mean...
A man put a blind man in a circular room and said, "Your dinner's in the corner."
I donated 100 dollars to a blind children’s charity. Too bad they won’t ever see a dime of it.
I was with my blind friend, and he's telling me, "Yeah, I can read braille." So I hand him a Lego brick and ask him to read it. Apparently, Lego has been hiding a dark secret from us for years; as all their bricks read, "Screw you, asshole."
A blind man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bartender replies with, "I'm blonde, the man working next to me is blonde, the woman next to you is blonde, and the fat guy behind you is blonde." Then says, "Do you really wanna tell the blonde joke?" The blind guy responds with, "No, I don't wanna tell it that many times."
What did the guy with no teeth say to a blind guy... How many fingers am I holding up?
I bought my blind friend a house on the edge of a cliff.
They died of happiness and a 30 story fall.
A blind comedian was asked to do stand up for a hospital. No one laughed at his jokes, so he continued to sing, "If you're happy and you know it..."
The room was full of arm amputees.
How did the blind girl get a date?
She said it was love at first sight.
Yo mama so blind that when she played Fortnite, she got her vision back, got 'em!
Lesbians and blind women wear the same clothes.
Did you hear about the blind prostitute?
Well, you gotta hand it to her.
What did the blind man fight in the bar?
The coat rack.
A man broke into Stevie Wonder's house and threatened to kill his wife.
He just turned a blind eye.
A blind man is going for a walk. Eventually, he reaches a fish market.
He yells, "Hello ladies!"