Newest Battery Jokes - Page 2

Emo: Phone die) Emo: Why not me ;(

I asked a emo do they get jealous when their phone dies

:Charger: yo Phone :Phone: yeah Charger can I plug all in u :Phone: ayooo

I got jealous when my phone died

Boobs are like batteries... AA will get the job done... C is bigger than AA... D is bigger that C... ...and if they're square, you don't want to put your tongue on them!

1. If being ugly was a crime you would have a life sentence

2. My phone battery lasts longer than your friendships

3. There is a tree out there giving you oxegyn, and you owe that tree an apology.

4. I don’t hate you, but I gotta unplug your life support to charge my phone.

5. When I saw your dad on the side walk I didn’t laugh but the sidewalk cracked up.

6. If I had powers I would make you the dumbest person alive but it seems life already beat me to the punch.

7. If karma ever comes to punch ya in the face, I wanna be there to help it

8. If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart I’d be broke.

9. You are more disappointing than a cake without frosting

10. Were you born on a highway cuz that’s where most accidents happen

11. Wow, that hurts, now I know how it felt when your mom said that to ya

12. Your the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo, and you may as well be the reason why the middle finger was invented

Normal girl staying her opinion. My name is Jade Harris. I don’t know if you guys know it but “rape” jokes is really starting to get sexist and could lead to people getting raped. IT IS MY OPINION PEOPLE DON’T HATE ME! 😡. People are talking about how men are more better than women but men and women are both good, some one posted about how they hate the media being about women and other bull crap but fuck it I hate the media being about both genders. And people sound like fucking rapist here!!! Some boy did story time and then said women are weak and I can rape a women if I feel like it and shit! But know one knows what it feels like to be a women? Only women do. 😠. Women have to have kids with men of course but it is hard to be a like that. 1 we grow up just the same as men and men don’t always get judge for dressing except for that stupid pants were we can see ur underwear shit which is. Pt style. Women are the ones who pay the bills, lose half of there energy and MOST of the time take care of the kids and work for a living men do too. But women get raped and harassed and molested and sexual assaulted/battery/abuse, and when a women wants to dress up how she feels she gets slit shamed for it. So really being a women is harder will being both genders are. Facts!!!