Atom jokes

When Ant-Man is the size of an atom, how can he breathe?

A nucleus walked into a bar. He asked the bartender, “How much for a drink?” The bartender replied, “For you, NO CHARGE!”

Americans are so fat that they named an atom bomb "Fat Man" to describe themselves.

There is a really, really small guy and his name is Adam, so I say, "Hey, look, it's an atom!"

For some reason, quarks sound really strange to me.

Q. What did one Iron atom say to the other Iron atom?

A. "We're in the Matrix."

Two atoms were walking on a street. One atom said to the other: "I'm feeling really positive today," and the other replied: "I know. I stole your electron." Then the first atom said "How Ionic."

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.

I heard oxygen and magnesium were dating, and I was like, "OMg!"

Do you know why an atom is positive? He kept his electrons.

Yo momma so fat, she made up of a lot of atoms.

If I get an atom, I would split it with you.

Why did the glacier send the iceberg to college?

Because, in order for ice to exist, it must retain a temperature of less than... ZERO DEGREES at the atomic level!

What atom presents TV shows?

David Atombrough.

You're gay.

Archer riddle has less atoms in his brain than he does in his dick, and his dick is 1/4 of a millimeter.

"Harry Hicks smells of home. Homo is an infection, and infections are made up of atoms."

Your nana gay, just like you, and you're made of atoms, nerd.

Do atoms eat booty? No, because they are too cool. ;)

I made someone a PB and J sandwich... they died.