ANS jokes
What do you call an annoyed octopus?
Octopissy.
What is an orphan's favorite website? Zillow.
Why does an orphan always try to escape the orphanage?
Because he wants to get money to buy a family since they won't buy him.
"Sonic Says", "If you're ever bored and have nothing to do, then just punch an orphan in the face. Who are they gonna tell? Their parents?"
What kind of cake can an orphan not have?
Homemade.
There is an upside to being an orphan.
Every bag of chips is family size.
An orphan went on a game show.
The host looked at him and said, "You can't play, this is Family Feud."
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.
I thought happiness started with an “H.” Why does my happiness start with “U”?
Why does an orphan have to go to church? Because that's the only way he can pray for a father.
I saw a little boy begging for money.
I said, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yes, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents!"
Why are there only 363 days on an orphan's calendar?
They don't have Father's Day and Mother's Day.
Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!
So an orphan goes to the store and gets a bunch of cartons of milk.
The cashier goes, "Woah, why so much?"
The orphan goes, "My dad never came back with the milk, so, well, here we are!"
Why is an iPhone X perfect for an orphan?
Because it has no home button.
What's an orphan's favorite movie? "Going Home."
I'm not sure how I'm going to get to Heaven.
God had not built a ramp yet... or an escalator.
Why did the orphan get an iPhone X? Because there's no home button.
What part in the body does an adult not need but actually needs to live?
A KIDNey!
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
I cry when I chop onions.