And jokes

What's the difference between orphans and girlfriends? I don't have 100 girlfriends locked in my basement.

What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cube have in common?

The more you play with it, the harder it gets.

So, I was on the phone with a scam caller. He said he knew where I lived and would kill my children and wife. Jokes on him, I already did.

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    • What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist?

    You can negotiate with a terrorist.

    What do boobs and toys have in common?

    They were both originally made for kids, but daddies end up playing with them.

    One like and whatever you say in the comments I'll do, but one rule: it can only be 2-4 hours in or out of Gloucestershire and South Gloucestershire.

    I'm great at multitasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.

    Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered, "Y?"

    What is the difference between a fat person and a whole pizza?

    Well, a whole pizza cannot eat a fat person.

    I have no dad, no milk, and no mom, so that means no tits, like if you can relate.

    A man saw a lady with big breasts. He asked, "Excuse me, can I bite your breasts for $1000?" She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her breasts for 10 minutes. Eventually, the lady asks, "Aren't you gonna bite them?" He replies, "No, it's too expensive."

    What’s the difference between Hitler and Steven Hawking?

    Nothing, they're both dead, one painted the walls and the other committed suicide by pressing ALT + F4.

  • 4

    • "Buy a man an airplane ticket, he will fly once. Throw a man off an airplane and he will fly for the rest of his life."

    - Sun Tzu