Alzheimers jokes
Today is Elder Abuse Awareness Day.
Unfortunately, they're still not giving lessons on how to beat an annoying Alzheimer's patient without leaving a mark.
My local pet store sells prong collars to get dogs to behave.
But when I tried them on an Alzheimer's patient, I got fired from the nursing home.
What's the difference between a blonde chick and Alzheimer's?
None, because they both forget a lot.
I had an Alzheimer's joke, but something's fogging up my mind.
Comedy is so woke these days. You can't make fun of any disadvantaged group.
Except people with Alzheimer's. They'll just forget you made the joke in five minutes anyway.
Wanna hear a joke about Alzheimer's? Wanna hear a joke about Alzheimer's? Wanna hear a joke about Alzheimer's?
Q. What do you call a person with Alzheimer's?
It doesn't matter. They'll forget what you said in thirty seconds anyway.
Q. What's an Alzheimer's victim's favourite song? A. Stand Down at Sundown.
If you think I would joke about Alzheimer's, forget it.
Q. What's the difference between an Alzheimer's patient and a tomato? A. A tomato isn't a vegetable.
What's an Alzheimer's victim's favorite musical group?
The Who?
Q. What do a one-story house and an Alzheimer's victim have in common? A. Nothing going on upstairs.
My doctor told me I had Alzheimer’s.
I said to him, “I don’t remember asking.”
I know how to cut down on Medicare expenses.
Lock Alzheimer's patients in dog cages when they misbehave.
Political correctness has gone too far! You have to say "cognitive decline" rather than "Alzheimer's ridden shitbag"!
My first thought when I read Betty Pear's obituary was, "Thank God for Alzheimer's!"
If you're ever in need of a punching bag, just go to your local Alzheimer's unit.
They'll forget you were there in like three minutes.
Why can you rub a dog's nose in their pee when they go on the carpet but when I do the same to an Alzheimer's patient I get fired from the nursing home?
Q' What's an Alzheimer's victim's favorite type of comedy?
A. I forget.
I hope Betty Pears was a Buckcherry fan.
She literally died a crazy bitch.