Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between a hoe and a prostitute?
One is a tool. The other is your mom.
If you look for something for 10 days and a woman walks in, opens a cabinet, and finds it:
So, just hire a female pope for the Holy Grail that has been missing for 500 years so she just opens a cabinet and she finds it.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite fruit?
Boisenberry.
Trump got a new jet.
He's probably already licked the windows.
Why did Kamala Harris visit the library?
To check out some “law” books and maybe return a few skeletons.
heeeeeheeeeeeeeenjkxbzskrf
Q' What's an Alzheimer's victim's favorite type of comedy?
A. I forget.
Q. What's an aborted baby's favourite type of humor? A. ...
Q. What's an emo's favorite type of comedy?
A. Gallows humor.
I take back my comments on the United healthcare CEO.
Being poisoned by a nurse wouldn't be that bad of a way to die as long as the nurse diluted the potassium chloride first.
What is a nudist's least favorite holiday?
Memorial Day.
Why?
Because wearing a poppy can be very painful.
I hope Betty Pears was a Buckcherry fan.
She literally died a crazy bitch.
I was watching TV with my brother, and a diabetes commercial came on saying, "I have type one diabetes, and I manage it well."
My brother said, "You want a cookie?"
A gay couple walks into a Muslim bar. The tender flares up and says, “let me guess, a little blood on the rocks?”
Having survived a severe injury in my past, I'm kind of glad paramedics didn't succeed in bringing the United Healthcare CEO back.
I was suffering so bad I got delirious and thought that the nurses were putting poison in my water cup.
That CEO was so hated that one of the nurses probably WOULD have slipped him something!
I was watching TV with my brother, and a diabetes commercial came on saying, "I have type one diabetes, and I manage it well." My brother said, "You want a sugar cookie?"
Q. Why couldn't Terri Schiavo give good blow jobs?
A. She didn't know how to swallow.
Shower thought: If everyone had schizophrenia, no one would know we had schizophrenia or know what it is!
What made you suddenly lose interest in someone you were pursuing?
When I found out they liked me back. Not interested in someone with poor judgment.
I used to think all Americans were racist.
Now I've changed my mind. They DID elect an orange president.