A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she’s seeing someone. It’s either terrible news or great news.
Worst Jokes Ever
I was playing chess with my friend and he said, "Let’s make this interesting."
So we stopped playing chess.
Man: Doctor, where are you taking me?
Doctor: To the morgue.
Man: But I’m not dead yet.
Doctor: Are we there yet?
Why did the egg hide? It was a little chicken!
Patient: Oh, doctor, I’m just so nervous. This is my first operation.
Doctor: Don’t worry. Mine too.
You're so scary that even your hairline ran away.
Q: What do you call an Asian paralympian?
A: Lim Ping.
Person 1: “You assume I’m gay because I have rainbow hair, I’m wearing a rainbow shirt, and I have a rainbow pride flag behind me?”
Person 2: “You assume I’m disabled because I have deformed arms and limbs, no legs, and I ride around in a wheelchair?”
How do you know someone has Down syndrome?
They're doing better than you.
I loved the Twin Towers, it's a shame my dad didn't.
Jokes about ISIS are all about the execution.
Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?
Because they have no body to go with.
The most corrupt CEOs are those of the pretzel companies.
They’re always so twisted!
You should go soul searching. Maybe you'll find one.
Yo mama is so ugly that the Grinch fell out when he saw her!
What happens when a strawberry gets run over crossing the street? Traffic jam.
Which is faster, hot or cold?
Hot, because you can catch cold.
My uncle named his dogs Timex and Rolex. They're his watch dogs.
Did you hear about the guy whose left side was cut off? He's all right now.
What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato.
