Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

If Stephen Hawking is dying, where do I take him, Currys PC World, or a hospital?

  • 1
  • I have a penis.

    How's that for a fucking joke? It's not a joke. It's terrible.

    500 thumbs down and I'll lop off my dick with a razor.

    Two men are in a rainforest, and one of them is peeing. Suddenly, a snake jumps out of some bushes and bites the man’s penis. The other man says, “Oh my God, I will go to a doctor immediately!” He didn’t have enough time to load the man into the car, so he went straight to the hospital. The man told the doctor what happened, and the doctor said, “You will have to make an incision at the wound and suck the poison out.” The man went back to the other man and said, “There is no hope, you will die.”

  • 8
  • What do you think is going through kids' heads during school shootings? Bullets.

  • 0
  • Q: How do you know when an Asian broke into your house?

    A: Your math homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and 2 hours later he's still trying to back out of the driveway.

  • 9
  • Bully: "I bet your dick is so small when you look down in the shower you can't even see it."

    Guy: "No, I see your sister's head."

    Stop saying negative shit about dark humor jokes! If it bugs you that bad, then go away! That'll solve everything but world hunger and failed abortion.

  • 5
  • How do you throw a surprise party at a hospital?

    Bring a strobe light into the epilepsy ward.

  • 8
  • Sticks and stones may break my bones, but there will always be something that offends feminists.

  • 9