I wondered if becoming a furry could help me escape my crippling depression... Unfortunately, the veterinarian insisted that he still wasn't going to euthanize me.
White girl : So this crystal cures my depression and helps me lose weight? Me holding a rock of meth : YES!!!
How did the man with no arms commit suicide? We'll never know - he didn't leave a note.
Q: What's really long and black? A: The line at KFC
Q: What do you call a Mexican fighting a catholic priest?
A: Alien vs. Predator
I told a orphan there was 363 days in a year
Q: How do emo kids complement each other? A: I like your cuts g
What kind of club is every parent afraid of their kid joining?
The Mikey Jackson club
How do you spell the name of the most dangerous pedophile?
M-I-C-H-A-E-L J-O-S-E-P-H J-A-C-K-S-O-N
There's a new bird disease, it's called churpies. It's a canariel disease, untweetable .
[Them]: "Don't you think you'll feel ashamed of all the suicide jokes you've made when you get older?"
[Me]: "When I what?" 0-0
Took my receipt to the sperm bank so I can get this comeback
whats big and white and cant climb trees? a fridge
Why don’t you act like your hairline and kindly take several steps back
this guy comes knocking on the door in hell and speaks to god please let me out it is too cold in here god is all confused there is a big fire in there the guy answers yes there is but you cannot get near it all the bishops cardinals and priests are sitting around it
A homeless man sits in front of a home Depot, a man walking out of the store hands him some money and asks "Why are you in front of the home Depot?" And the man says "Isn't it obvious? Hoping somebody accidentally drops the house they just bought."
Why do Nazis don’t wear necklaces,rings, and bracelets? Because they hate jewelry.
An orphan can’t ever play Grand Theft Auto V because he can’t get a wanted level.
What’s one thing that an orphan can never get in poker?
A full house
Orphan:can I come over Girl: yhea but you have to your parents.
What’s the difference between a Michael Jackson and a shopping bag.
Is a dangerous for kids if put on their face the other one is used to carry groceries
