Worst Jokes Ever
What do cows listen to on headphones?
moo-sic.
What's the difference between a baby and a brick?
A brick doesn't cry when you throw it on a wall.
How do you make a peanut laugh? You crack it up!
Just think, when we're getting fucked, we make our own food.
Using pi, distract the fat kid next to you so you can copy his answers.
How [does] a disabled kid face [the] Jalalas?
He can't run, just hug the bomb.
When someone says you're an orphan, say, "At least I was wanted, unlike you!"
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To die on the other side.
Why was the tamale in the hospital? Because he was a "tamalito."
I wanna date you.
Said mom, dad said no, you are a horrid, f*cking d*ck.
What did the mustard say to the ketchup? "Quit running so fast, let me ketchup to you."
Beast joke ever: my life... Oh wait, I don't have one.
Hey daddy *winky face*
My dumb ass thinking I made a friend, oh ya, I forgot, literally nobody likes me!
Who was Goldilocks' best friend?
Goldie.
What do you call a dog that tells the time?
A watchdog.
If an orphan tells you there's 365 days in a year, tell them for you it's only 363 days because you skip Father's Day and Mother's Day.
Little Johnny asks a fireman, "Do you want to see my fire truck?"
So the fireman goes to look at it. Little Johnny tested it. "I got my hat in my fire truck."
So the fireman says, "Last night's alright, but why is it tied up to you wagging?" And he looks closer and sees the string is tied up in knots. He said, "That's nice all right, but why is it tied up to his nuts?"
The little Johnny said, "Well that's my son," and so he yanks on it.
When I see James Charles, my popcorn goes pop pop.
So, I was laying in bed and it's winter, so my room is always cold because the heater doesn't work.
And I was thinking.... It would be warmer if someone else was laying here with me.... Then I laughed because who would wanna be with me. Hahaha