Worst Jokes Ever
A Russian wife turned to her husband and asked...
"What's this special military operation our glorious leader keeps talking about?"
Her husband replied, "It's a proxy war between Russia and NATO."
"Oh, right. How's it going?"
"Well," he replied, "so far we've lost 200,000 soldiers, 4,000 tanks, 500 aircraft, numerous helicopters, loads of armoured vehicles and artillery pieces along with our 'flag ship'."
"Wow! What about NATO?"
"They haven't turned up yet."
What did one twin say to the other?
"Watch out for the plane!"
What did the woman say when I told a rape joke?
"I don't get it."
Woman: Doctor, doctor, I've been raped.
Doctor: Sex is good for you!
Why can't a citizen in communist China, especially a Chinese male who is between 18-29 years old, buy a box of condoms in a drug store in communist China?
Because the condom would be too big for the penis of Chinese men in communist China.
I don’t like the term "rape," I prefer: "struggle snuggle."
What did the rape victim give to her rapist?
Head.
What happened to the woman who dated a rapist?
She was date raped.
How do you know if a rapist loves you?
He will rape you many times.
Why were the Twin Towers disappointed?
They asked for a pepperoni pizza and all they got was a plane.
Why did the rape victim cross the road?
Because she was a chicken!
What kind of rape victim has a shower ten times a day?
The type that gets raped a lot.
What did they find in Paul Walker's glovebox?
His head and shoulders.
Did you hear about the TikTok post that offended disabled people? Some didn't reply because the comment section was disabled.
Your hairline is so far back, it was in a different time zone on a flight with you.
Yo mama so hairy that she got a haircut and lost 47 pounds.
One day at school, I made fun of a girl who lost her hair from cancer, and my parents made me shave my head.
The next day at school, I made fun of an orphan.
No one:
Nothing:
Not a single f***ing soul:
Spanish Empire: DING DONG YOUR RELIGION IS WRONG!
One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card, and we live far, and my mom was hungry.
A guy and his friend had a car and asked us if we were lost. We said no, we have no ride, no money, and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each, so I was driving the car and my mom gave both guys a blowjob. We had to get out of the car to look for something, then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I asked what the bad news was. They said that they're not taking us home, so I asked what the good news was. They told me that they fed my mom and drove off. I guess where they left us wasn't a long walk and my mom wasn't hungry anymore.
What planet did Hitler hate the most?
Jewpiter.