Worst Jokes Ever
I called a Suicide Helpline, but they didn't help me commit suicide.
Tbh they really left me hanging there.
How did the man with no arms commit suicide?
We'll never know - he didn't leave a note.
A homeless man sits in front of a Home Depot. A man walking out of the store hands him some money and asks, "Why are you in front of the Home Depot?" And the man says, "Isn't it obvious? Hoping somebody accidentally drops the house they just bought."
Why do Nazis not wear necklaces, rings, and bracelets? Because they hate jewelry.
What meds do snakes with ADHD take?
Adder-all.
What’s positive in Africa?
HIV/AIDS.
What is 80 feet wide and has 22 teeth?
Answer: The front row of a Trump Rally!
A husband and wife at custody court. The judge looks sternly at the ex-wife.
Judge: "Why do you think you deserve custody of the child?"
Ex-wife: "I brought him into this world, so I should have custody of him."
Judge: "That is a simple yet good reason."
Then the judge looks toward the ex-husband.
Judge: "Why do you think you deserve custody of the child, sir?"
The ex-husband thought long and hard about his response. After a brief moment of silence, he replies, "If I put money into a Pepsi machine and a Pepsi comes out, is it mine or the machine's?"
A Muslim enters a building with 100 passengers and an airplane.
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair with a gun? RG-XD
What does a pedophile mostly pound on a piano?
A minor.
What's the slogan for a Muslim gym?
Might in dynamite.
KFC proudly presents the kid fryer meal where our fillets are made out of kids. 😎 1 like = more kids in our fryer.
what's worse than a baby in a trash can? A baby in two trash cans.
What is the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
Pikachu, I choose you!
What did the sex offender frog say to the other sex offender frog when a hot frog passed them?
Rrrrrapeit!
Consent before sex is a joke. It's just politically correct feminazi propaganda.
Friend: Why do you like Minecraft so much?
Me: Because I love miners!
What does an Al Qaeda terrorist and a flexible man have in common?
They can blow themselves up.
Rape can happen to anybody, so I think I will continue taking the short cut home through the dark alleyways, wearing barely anything and walk really close to bushes.