Worst Jokes Ever
Smoking a fag in the UK means to smoke a cigarette.
Smoking a fag in the USA means to kill a homosexual.
"I think my baby is so similar to me!"
"True, but the most important thing is that he is healthy!"
Two needles go to the river. One of them says, "I'm sorry!"
I remember when I saw my dad's penis for the first time.
I said, "Dad, don't text me shit like that."
Did you know that soccer fields aren't made of 4 million crayons? They are actually made from grass. :)
A toaster and a slice of whole wheat bread sit together in the sauna.
After five minutes, the bread starts to sweat extremely and says: "Oh, I think I'm going to be a toast in here!"
The toaster just looks at it bored from the side and replies: "Don't get upset. I'm just here to really switch off."
Did you hear about the tourist that came to New York? Good, because they were a terrorist... When they were asked why they were traveling, they just mispronounced it.
How do terrorists feed their babies?
"Here comes the aeroplane!"
What is 6-inch long, in every men's pants or hands, and girls want?
- A smartphone, freak.
I just went to a Halloween party for rappers and rap DJs from the Czech Republic, and everyone was dressed in the same costume! I couldn't tell which witch was Wich!
What is a Christian's favorite social networking site?
Faithbook!
I just found out that one of the new Star Wars shows is going to be about the time that some malware overloaded all of their computers, and I can tell from the title that those computers use Windows!
It's called "The Bad Batch File!"
Why did the deer go to the dentist?
It had buck teeth.
How does a pimp answer when asked why he chose his occupation?
Answer: He wanted a stable source of income.
Why is an apple not called a "red", but an orange is called an "orange"?
Geowipp Grand Prize. And the CHOICE OF FOOD IS INSANE. We love him and we love him.
August is a guy from one of the shops, and we became a sundwich durk through Habin. We have GOT GO GO, IT WAS GRAT. That's why. But we don't do everything.
Why do you need an AR-15?
So my son can use it if he's being bullied at school.
What kind of punch takes out 20 children and 8 adults? A Sandy Hook.
They didn't burn witches back in the day, they burned bitches.
Why do lesbians go to Sports Authority?
Because they don't like Dick's!