Worst Jokes Ever

I’m not saying my life’s a joke. I’m saying it’s the punchline no one asked for.

What's the difference between a prostitute and a Democrat? A Democrat will keep screwing you when you run out of money.

Yo mama so fat...

...people in Florida start buying flood insurance when they see her waddling toward the ocean.

What did Snow White say when she sat on Pinocchio? "Lie to me."

What did Michael Jackson say when dinner was ready? Ea-ea-eat.

I asked for emotional support. They handed me a mirror and said, "Talk to someone who cares."

I saw names carved into a tree and thought it was romantic. Until I realized how many people bring knives on dates.

I used to be into fitness. But running from my problems got exhausting.

I bought a coffin on Black Friday. It was a killer deal.

Communists don't play Minecraft.

They play Ourcraft.

Roses are red, I need a broom, I just shit all over the bathroom.

Why can't Juice WRLD hit rock bottom?

Because he's too high.

I said I’m losing my mind. My friend said, “You didn’t have much to begin with.”

I told my therapist I feel suicidal. He charged me in advance.

Rip Juice WRLD.

What does Michael Jackson say when it gets hot?

He-he-eat!

What's the difference between a prostitute and a Democrat? A prostitute will stop screwing you when you run out of money.

My dog is called Syndrome. He jumps up at me and I shout, "Down, Syndrome! Down, Syndrome!"

What's the difference between a sheet and a baby?

One of them is really loud when you iron it.

Sometimes, you've got to specifically go out of your way to get into trouble. It's called fun.