Worst Jokes Ever
My doctor told me that I had to burn calories, so I took a fat kid and lit them on fire
There are so many things going through my head. Sadly, none of it is a 9mm.
How to tell your kid he's adopted:
Son, I'm a virgin.
What do you call a happy child swinging with her friends at recess?
Not Sally.
Oh my god, she hit me with a bat,
'Cause she was transgender.
What is the most musical part of a chicken?
The drumstick.
If olive oil is made of olives, then baby oil is made of...
I showed my girlfriend my shotgun yesterday. It really blew her away.
Hey, can't wait to meet you! So join the crippling depression family!!
1. You're so dumb, you think Cheerios are donut seeds!
2. You're so fat, you could sell shade!
3. You're just like coconut water, nobody likes you!
4. Have you been shopping lately? Because they're selling lives around the corner, you should go get one!
If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence!!
Are these good?
Why did the frog cross the road?
To show his gang that he had guts.
What do bicycles and slaves have in common? They both use chains to work.
Why did the police go to a baseball game?
Because a player stole the base.
Why was 10 scared of 9?
Because 9 8 7.
What’s the difference between a hoe and a rooster?
A rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-doo," and a hoe says, "Any cock will do."
Why did the Chinese woman hang up? Because she Wang the Wong number.
What do penguins 🐧 eat for lunch?
Freeze burgers.
What is the world's greatest invention? The ball gag, do you know why? Honestly, officer, I never heard her say no.
10 Fun Facts.
1. You can't wash your eyes with soap. 2. You can't count your hair. 3. You can't breathe through your nose with your tongue out. 4. You just tried number 3. 5. When you did number 3, you realized it's possible, only you look like a dog. 6. You're smiling right now because you were fooled. 7. You skipped number 5. 8. You just checked to see if there is a number 5. 9. Share this with your friends to have some fun too :-)
"When Republicans do politics, it's a crime. But when Democrats commit crimes, it's politics." ---Tyler Nixon