Worst Jokes Ever
Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because he had no body to go with.
Doctor: "I am so sorry, I cannot see you today."
Orphan: "Oh, okay. What about tomorrow?"
Doctor: "No, I can't see you ever."
Orphan: "Why?"
Doctor: "Because I am a family doctor."
What did one orphan say to the other one?
"Get in the Batmobile, Robin."
Two hunters are in the woods when one of them collapses. He's not breathing and his gaze is blank. The other hunter grabs his phone and calls emergency services: "My friend is dead! What do I do?"
The emergency dispatcher replies: "Calm down. I can help you. First, make sure he's really dead."
Silence on the other end, then a gunshot. Back on the phone, the hunter asks: "Okay, now what?"
Do you know the F in "orphan" stands for family?
There is no F in "orphan".
Exactly.
Have you heard about the dyslexic devil worshipper?
He sold his soul to Santa.
What do you call an army of autistic people?
Special forces!
The great meme reset is like a fart. If you force it, it's gonna be shit.
What’s the difference between an orphan’s parents and a boomerang?
The boomerang came back.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 was black.
My friend is a pimp.
I think he's having an existential crisis. Lately, he just wants to be alone with his thots.
If your wife has boxes and boxes ending up at your front door from her online shopping habit, tell her that you’ve only had one box through the marriage and that she should be happy.
What do you call a fight at a dementia unit?
A Sundown Smackdown.
What’s the difference between a woman and a mosquito?
A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.
My girlfriend called me a pedophile.
And I said, "That's a big word for a 5-year-old!"
Children are like pills.
The smaller they are, the easier they are to take.
Why do Chinese people never play baseball?
Because they always eat the bat.
What do you call a terrorist in a bath?
A bath bomb.
Why were the Twin Towers mad during 9/11?
They ordered pepperoni pizza, but instead got plane.
What's the difference between a boomerang and a Black father?
A boomerang comes back.