Yours jokes

Your hairline is so far back that even Hitler wouldn't shoot it.

Hey, guys! Just a quick reminder to spread kindness today and treat others how you want to be treated!

Rate your day on a scale of 1-10 in the comments below. Mine was about a 7. Also, can you guys please comment [on] what you guys want me to cover in these little messages? Sometimes it's hard to tell if you guys like that I'm doing this kind of stuff or not.

If you got a crush and you are a 👧🏻 girl, let him lick 👅 your vagina.

Why did Hellen Keller's dogs run away?

Because wouldn't you runway too if your name was djhdhekdndyekedhekekfjkfurir?

Your earlobes are so big, you can fit your mom inside of them 5000 times and still have room for more!

I’m not religious, but you’re the answer to all of my prayers.

Your sister: You're so ugly.

Me: But we look the same, so who's also ugly?

Your mum is so ugly she could make an onion cry.

If your uncle Jack needed help getting off of a horse, would you help your uncle Jack off a horse?

If you don't have big Nyash,

Lower your voice while talking to me, you Mau Mau warrior. 😂😂😂

Johnny Depp to a 15-year-old girl: "Wow, look at that sexy body! Savvy!"

Michael Jackson, when talking about a 6-year-old boy: "The boy is mine! That doggone boy is mine! Don't waste your time...."

Donald Trump, Bill Clinton, and Jeffrey Epstein entering and exclaiming, "Wow, this place is more fun than the Playboy Mansion!"

Your mom is so fat, she starts the alphabet with the letter "o" for obesity, hahaha!

I was walking down the street and saw a kid and I said, "Are you an orphan?"

He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"

I said, "Your parents at first."

Your mummy is so tall, she uses the Eiffel Tower as a dildo.

If you text your crush and they leave you on read, just know that "read" has four letters. You know what also has four letters? "Mine." So that basically means that you are theirs. :)

Your mama's so fat that she can’t even talk, even if Kevin says, "Oh my gosh!" 'cause she has a big ass mouth.

What do you say when your pet pig gets lost?

This is a pig problem!

"There is no way you can fit in there."

"Says who?"

"Your mom."

"When?"

"Last night."

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-"

Is it sexual harassment if a midget walks by you and tells you that your hair smells nice?

Where's your off button?