Whos jokes
What do you call a rabbit who is really cool?
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Pencil.
Pencil who?
Oh, never mind, it's pointless.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
It's me. I can't get in because Stephen Hawking is blocking the door!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Anita.
Anita who?
Anita poo let me in!
Sally's mother had four children. The fourth April, the second May, the third June. Who was the first child?
Sally.
People who put jokes on here re: Depression are really not nice people, you yourselves are a fucking joke. 😩👎
Who is Helen Keller?
What is the difference between a human and a tree? A human being is the one who can drive.
I knew a guy who used to sell wrenches. He was all torque.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why?
To get to the gay kid's house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
A kid just becomes an orphan, well, I guess it's better than being a hobo.
I heard there is a zozo hobo who eats all your Pringles.
Yeah, Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh. You decide, if you're ever gonna, let me know (yeah). Suicide, if you ever try to let go, uh. I'm sad and low, yeah. I'm sad and low, yeah. Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh. You decide, if you're ever gonna, let me know (yeah). Suicide, if you ever try to let go, uh. I'm sad and low, yeah. I'm sad and low, yeah.
I gave her everything. She took my heart and left me lonely. I've been broken, heart's contentious. I won't fix, I'd rather weep. I'm lost and I'm found, but It's torture being in love. I love when you're around But I fucking hate when you leave. Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh. You decide, if you're ever gonna, let me know (yeah). Suicide, if you ever try to let go, uh. I'm sad and low, yeah. I'm sad and low, yeah. Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh. You decide, if you're ever gonna, let me know (yeah). Suicide, if you ever try to let go, uh. I'm sad and low, yeah. I'm sad and low, yeah. Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh. You decide, if you're ever gonna, let me know (yeah). Suicide, if you ever try to let go, uh. I'm sad and low, yeah. I'm sad and low, yeah. Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh. You decide, if you're ever gonna, let me know (yeah). Suicide, if you ever try to let go, uh. I'm sad and low, yeah. I'm sad and low, yeah.
Who did yo mama marry?
Joe Mama.
What do you call a musician 👩🎤 who drinks soda and sings 🎤 at the same time?
A popsinger.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the retard's house.
Knock knock. Who's there?
The chicken...
Who is chicken's favorite actor?
James Cor-hen!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Uriah. Uriah who? Keep Uriah on the ball, Laquon Treadwell!
A guy wins a free ticket to the Super Bowl and so he’s very excited.
However, he’s not so excited when he gets there and realizes his seat’s in the back of the stadium.
So he looks around him for a better seat, and to his surprise he finds an empty seat right next to the field.
He approaches the older guy who’s sitting in the seat next to the empty one and asks if the seat is taken.
The man replies, “No.”
The young guy is very surprised to hear this and asks, “How could someone pass up a seat like this?”
The older guy replies, “It’s my wife’s seat. We’ve been to every Super Bowl together since the day we were married but she’s passed away.”
“Oh, how sad,” the young guy says, taken aback. “I’m sorry to hear that, but couldn’t you find a friend or relative to come with you?”
“No,” the man replies, “They’re all at the funeral.”
A girl and boy are in bed after sex. The boy goes, “I can’t believe they got together after all that shit.” The girl says, “Who?” The boy goes, “My ass cheeks.”
There was a man who had just moved from a foreign country. He just moved into his apartment and was watching his favorite TV shows. The first one was "me-me-me, me-me-me, me-me-me-me-me-me-me," the second one was "forks and knives, forks and knives, all I use is forks and knives," and the last one was "BRING IT ON, FAT MAN!!"
There had been a murder in the area, and the man was walking in the park when a cop showed up and asked him, "Sir, have you seen this man?" and held up a photo. The man said "me-me-me, me-me-me, me-me-me-me-me-me-me." The cop said, "Sir, what did you use?" and the man said "forks and knives, forks and knives, all I use is forks and knives." After that, the cop said, "Sir, I'm going to have to arrest you," and the man said "BRING IT ON, FAT MAN!!" The screen goes black, and all you can here "chk-chk. BANG"