A man comes to a bar and has a drink. Then his bully came to him and stole his drink. Then the bully asked, "What's wrong?"
The man said that "I'm trying to kill myself. I tried getting hit by a train, but the train went on a different track. Then I tried to jump off a bridge, but I fell on a boat full of pillows. Then I tried to poison myself."
Then the bully says, "Then what?" Then the man replied, "You just drank it." Then the man left.
Where would the next Formula race happen?
Answer: On your flat chest.
So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.
When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"
He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."
What’s a gay person’s favorite race track?
Rainbow Road.
What is a Mexican person's favorite sport?
Cross country.
My suicidal friend said he liked trains, so we took him to the tracks.
When your legs forget how to work after leg day, I can't climb the stairs.
Michael Myers right behind me. Runs like I'm a track star!
There's a disabled kid in my class, right? Oops, should've brought my Hot Wheels tracks.
Why did the man go across the train tracks to get to the other side
How does a train eat?
It goes, "chew chew."
Why don't orphans have Life360?
Because parents won't track them.
What did Amtrak say at the Olympics?
I AM keeping Trak!
Why can’t Hitler do track?
He can’t even finish a race.
Why can't Hitler join track?
Because he can't even finish a race.
I was making fun of an orphan, then I realized he tracked me down. I made a bad decision. He was Batman!
What do you call a kid on the track team who isn't on the track team? A school shooter
I was doing a race, and I started after everyone 'cause I fell, but when I got up I realized I couldn't even race, not because I was behind, but because I can't go straight if I'm gay...
A friend of mine told me this joke a long time ago and I have never forgotten it.
A worm was crawling over a train track, and a train ran over him and cut off his ass. The worm turned around to get the piece of his ass back and another train ran over him and cut off his head.
BAD IDEA and a lesson to us all.
NEVER LOSE YOUR HEAD OVER A PIECE OF ASS!! LMAO (literally, kind of)( pretty sure you get it)
Why can't orphans become famous?
Because it will become easier for Technoblade to track them down.
Attention! Has anyone noticed that Watersharky and Kitten are dating? It's strange because they haven't said anything for 28 DAYS!!! They been keeping it a secret...(I guess). Someone needs to keep track of this. GOD, I just thought further into life with their relationship. DON'T DO THAT.
