The jokes

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A preacher was selling a horse. A cowboy decided to buy the horse. The preacher told the cowboy to make the horse go, to say "Thank God" and to stop the horse, to say "Hallelujah". The cowboy then rode off into the sunset until he came upon a cliff, searching his memory he yelled "Hallelujah" and the horse stopped just before going off the cliff. Then the cowboy said "Thank God".

One day a father and a daughter were at a park. The daughter accidentally kills a butterfly. The father says, "Just because you killed the butterfly, you don't get butter for a week."

They were there the next day, and the daughter kills a cockroach. The father laughs and says, "Nice try."

Why do they put barcodes on the ships in Norway?

Why?

So when they come into port, they can Scan-de-navian.

Why were the people in the Twin Towers mad? They wanted a drive-through pepperoni pizza, but got a fly-through plane instead.

What is the difference in having a granny fetish and necrophilia? A few weeks.

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    • A kid is watching TV and sees an ad about adopting an animal. He then turns to his mother and says, “Do we have to adopt a donkey?” “No,” replied the mom, “but we decided to do it... we adopted you.”

    Kid: "I wish I could be like Batman!"

    Genie: "Wish granted!"

    When the kid gets home, both of his parents are dead.

    The reason Stephen Hawkings died is probably because he fell off his wheelchair, and he must've pressed shut down by accident.

    The average human male walks for five miles, but the gas station is ten miles away. So why does it take fifteen years for my dad to buy cigarettes?

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