I locked Terri Schiavo in the freezer.
Hey, I thought that's where you were supposed to put vegetables!
Q. Why couldn't Terri Schiavo give good blow jobs?
A. She didn't know how to swallow.
Q: What's the difference between Terri Schiavo and a tomato?
A: A tomato isn't a vegetable.
If someone made a comedy routine about Terri Schiavo, would that be considered roasting a vegetable?
Q. What is Terri Schiavo's favorite Eminem song?
A. "Till I Collapse."
