Telescope jokes

Why did the rapper bring a telescope to the studio?

To see his FUTURE in the STARS.

Your hairline is so far away that even the Hubble Telescope can't see it.

How do astronomers organize a party? They planet.

A telescope has two uses:

1. To look in space. 2. To see your hairline.

Your momma's so fat, she had to take a selfie using the Hubble telescope.

The Stephen Hawking space telescope will be launched next year. Apparently, it will have four wheels and run off Windows 7.

I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer.

I saw it through my telescope last night.

What's NASA's grossest mission?

Probing Uranus.

Hubble just spotted something huge coming out of Uranus.

Sir William Herschel discovered Uranus in 1781, 200 years before you were born. How did he do that?

If Uranus is so gross, why do they take HD photos of it?

You're so fat, astronomers discovered a planet larger than Earth but smaller than Uranus.