Severus jokes

Why did Severus Snape cross the road wearing an invisibility cloak?

So no one would know what side he was on.

I cannot moderate myself at all. It's either I don't take my meds, or I take the entire bottle. Decisions, decisions...

Suicide is illegal because it's a crime to destroy government property.

Three nuns are talking, and the first nun says, "You would never believe what I discovered." Intrigued, the others signal her to continue. "I found a phone in the priest's room," said the first nun. "Oh, that's nothing," said the second one. "I found condoms in one of his drawers." said the second one. "What did you do with them?" said the first nun. Pridefully, the second nun responds with, "I poked holes in all of them." and the third nun says, "Oh sh*t...."

Say all you want about priests, but at least they drive slowly in school zones.

How you feel when you slit yourself once: :(

How you feel when you slit yourself more than once: <:(

How you feel when you slit yourself everyday: *dead inside*