Why is the Azovstal Steel Plant important to the Russian? Because it stores Zelensky's balls of steel!
Russians be like bfddrhnnkhsaxbjk speak English!
Russian twists into a ditch dead!
Putin be like, Finland and Sweden are bullying me with nato, the same nato that can't even reload a gun! Russians are pussies!
Boiled ham us what you call a dead Russian
White Russians do you mean ree,white, blue and dead white Russians?
A dead Russian is trumps accountant
What's blue, red and white and dead all over?
Trumps dead Russian mates
I have gathered intelligence regarding the Russian Forces that have been stalled in Ukraine for days. Apparently they are installing rear view mirrors on their combat Vehicles and Tanks in order to see the battle at the front lines.
What do you call a Russian rifle that went 1 rank down?
An AK-46.
Russian Santa Claus- You better watch out, You better not cry, cause if you do I will stab your fucking eye, Russian Santa Claus does not fuck around. He's making a list, He's checking it twice... You better leave out some Vodka with ice!
I've got an impressive record at Russian roulette, retired after one loss ever.
Have you ever seen that weird ad that pops up at the bottom:sexy Russian babes looking for men older than 30 and there 18 so is it a reverse pedo? O well
Q : Name a muderer ? A : Jews : Hitler. Russians : Stalin Chinese : Mao Americans : Bin Laden Aborted fetus : My mom
“hey what’s the russian president’s name?” “putin?” “yeah, putin deez nuts in yo mouth”
Do I like playing Russian Roulette? Gun to the head, I'd have to say no.
(found on web) There was an American wrestler from Texas named John, who throughout his high school career had never lost a match. As he went on into college he continued undefeated. He became a national icon and symbol of American strength.
News began to circulate of a Russian wrestler who was fierce and unstoppable. As each wrestlers legends grew, a match was set up between the two, America versus Russia. The match would be held in Texas.
John began training immediately. Every day his coach would tell him, “This Russian has a move called the Mongolian Death Grip. No one has ever escaped the Mongolian Death Grip. DO NOT let him get you in the Mongolian Death Grip”
The day of the match finally came. Just before each wrestler stepped onto the mat in front of the capacity crowd, the coach once again said, “Whatever you do, do not let him get you in the Mongolian death grip. No one has ever escaped the Mongolian death grip”.
Four seconds into the match, the Russian had the American in the Mongolian death grip. The coach buried his face into his hands and cursed John for not listening to his advice. All of the sudden he heard the crowd irrupt in a chant of USA USA USA. He looked up and saw the Russian pinned by John. The coach ran out to meet John and embarrassingly told him, “I didn’t see... Once he had you in the Mongolian Death Grip I looked away. How in the world did you get out of the Mongolian death grip?”
With heavy breath, John told him “Well coach, that Russian grabbed me and twisted my body in ways I never imagined possible. I was wincing in pain when I open my eyes and right in front of me were two testicles. So I bit them.”
“What???” Said the coach... “John I don’t think that is legal. You could be disqualified”
“I don’t know about that coach. But I can tell you one thing. You ain’t got no idea how strong you are until you bite your own balls”
Americans be like: Here is the US, we drive on the right side of the road.
England be like: Here in the UK, we drive on the left side of the road.
Russians after a car accident be like: Here in Russia, road is road.
Q .What does a Russian girl do when she gets unexpectedly pregn A. Has an a bosch tion
They call it the Cold War because Russia is cold in 2 ways.
