Road jokes
When you're going 80 km in a school zone and one of the speed bumps screams.
Why can’t the baby cross the road?
Walls.
So, this guy and his wife figure out that she has gotten pregnant. The baby is due March 31st. Well, the guy is at work and he gets a call from his wife. She tells him she is going into labor. He rushes to pick her up, and once he is on the road, he starts speeding. Eventually, he hits another car and swerves off the road into a ditch. He wakes up in the hospital, looks around but doesn’t see his wife. He asks the doctor, "Is my wife okay? She was carrying my child." The doctor said the wife is fine and the baby is in good health. 10 seconds later he goes, "APRIL FOOLS! Your wife is dead and your child has brain damage."
Why did the suicidal man walk in front of the car? To get to the other side.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his mom said, "Ven bakac."
Why did mommy disappear? The dad: Well, when she crossed the road to get to the chicken, she only made it halfway.
Why did the emo step in front of a car? To get to the other side.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Answer:
The man said, "He's going to rape the people on the side of the road."
Why did the serial killer cross the road? To get to the victim's house.
Knock, knock. Who's there? The serial killer.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
Yesterday, I tried to help a little girl by a road stop crying. I asked her where her parents were, and that made her cry harder. So then I asked her where her house was, and she said with tears, "I don't have one." So I got her in my car and drove her to where she said she was living. It was an orphanage.
When the speedbump in a school zone screams, so you go faster.
They named a road after George Floyd. It was a dead end, though.
Why did Sophia cross the road?
To eat her nuggies!
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Why did the chicken cross the road?
Really, there is an answer, and he never made it across, so...
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To try to find his parents, but it was FREAKING USELESS!
Why did the knight cross the road?
He can't because his armor was too heavy.
Why did your mom cross the road?
Why? She didn't, she got hit by a car.
Why did the feminist cross the road?
To suck my dick!
Americans be like: "Here is the US, we drive on the right side of the road."
England be like: "Here in the UK, we drive on the left side of the road."
Russians after a car accident be like: "Here in Russia, road is road."