1 2 3 4 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!
So a guy is evading the draft, the cops bang on his door and he runs out the back and through and alley way onto a road. He finds a nun and asks if he can hide under her blouse, she complies and the cops walk by and dont see them. The man comes back up from under the nuns blouse and says”Hey man, youve got a pair of balls!” The nun says, “I didnt wanna be drafted either....”
Whats yellow and cant swim but screams when it goes under. A school bus full of kids
A man driving along a country road sees a little girl crying next to a cliff. He gets out and says, "Aw, what's the matter little girl?" She points off the cliff and at the bottom is the family car, burning with everyone inside all mangled and dead. The man unbuckles his pants and says, "Little girl, today just ain't your day."
Why can't the orphan play the game of life? They don't know what a family road trip is. 😆
Why did mom cross the road? To kill you
Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road. So I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”
Why did ama cross the road
To find his dad
Why did the condom cross the road...... Because he was pissed off.
Say traffic and replace r with h it sounds like... that thicc
What do you call an idiot who walks on the road when cars are coming? Fresh road kill.
Why did the nose cross the road to find the person who nose
why did the orphan cross the road to die on the other side
Brother 2(1): We have these weird circles on the street! Government is trakin' us!!! Brother 1: They are just to sense cars so they can change lights. And its the government. Brother 2(1): Then why are there two in the left turn lane Brother 1: So 1 car isn't always going left and stopping the others. Brother 2(1): Then why are they 1 car apart. Oh to have 3 people going. Brother 1: Correct. When i see 1 car on the first. i go on the 2nd so my light changes. Brother 2(1): You monster. Brother 1: I wonder if they trigger by weight? Brother 2(1):HA. yo mama would trigger the sensor. Brother 1. ARG. its OUR MAMA your disrespecting. Mother (brother 1):whats going on boys? *looks in mirror* HOLY SH@& SHE IS PRETTY! Brother 2(1): i think you should take your pills. Brother 1: found them. *imaginary mother and brother fade away* thank you ELECTROBOOM for inspiring this joke/sh!t. Go subb to him. btw the (1) means it is just imaginary brother one acting like another brother.
why did the skeleton cross the road? to get ta skull.
why did the man cross the road...?
because he wanted to :) :) :)
A guy walks into an AA meeting and ask for a road map.
Why didnt the skeleton cross the road?
Because he was part of the Lazy Bones team!
Why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get run over and poop and he died for 30 years until he been sent to Joe for getting runned over and he got killed by something and then he died and then he got it by you poop
A American goes on a British bus after being in war he wants to sit down so he goes to the back of the bus to sit down but there is a old woman on the seat with her dog in the next the man says will you move your dog the lady says oh you Americans always so demanding and she says to sit some where else he goes through and finds no seats so now he at the back again this time he throws the dog out the window and sits down the man in front says you Americans always do things wrong first yoy drive on the wrong side of the road then hold you knife and fork wrong and you threw the wrong bitch out the window
