Yesterday, I saw an advert with random woman dancing, and someone said that they were beautiful. And then I said "Except the fat people." And then I got sent to my room for saying that.
Random guy: "Go suck a D*ck!"
Me: Nah, I'd rather suck a 9mm.
me:hi Jaiden bully/Jaiden harper:leave me alone weirdo me:wow says the one who didn't pass 3RD grade bully/Jaiden harper:"*hits*" me:*calls fbi and puts on gloves and stabs random person then gives knife to Jaiden and takes off gloves*"bye bye" fbi:"FBI OPEN UP!!!!!!!!!"
You: Why did the chicken cross the road? Random person: Why? You: To get to the idiot's house! Random person: What? You: Knock knock Random person: Who's there? You: The chicken.
Me: *looks at persons hand* This guy doesn't have fingers!
Random person with no fingers: Why do you have to point that out?
One day a guy named Carson is called a jerk and he says "I went to a party with my girlfriend and this random guy walks up to us and says can I borrow your girlfriend for a 30 minutes I say yes and he takes her up stairs. It was not only 30 minutes but a hour. When she came back down she was out of breath so I knew it was a pretty intense conversation.this happens about 3 more times that night. But as I was saying only a nice guy would let his girlfriend make friends with other guys 😊😇
Guy 1: "Tell me a bad pun."
Guy 2: "Alright. What's the difference between a tuna fish, a piano, and a tube of glue?"
Guy 1: "Ok, that last one was random as heck. What is the difference?"
Guy 2: "You can tuna a piano, but you can't piano a tuna."
Guy 1: "Ok, where does the glue come in?"
Guy 2: "Ah, I knew you'd get stuck on that."
Student: 503 bricks are on a plane. 1 falls off. How many are left?
Teacher: 502.
Student: How do you put an elephant in a fridge?
Teacher: No, you can't fit an elephant in a fridge!!
Student: Just open door, put elephant in, close door.
Student: How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?
Teacher: open door, put giraffe in, close door
Student: No! Open door, take elephant out, put giraffe in, close door.
Student: The Lion King is having a B-day party. All the animals are there, except one. Which one?
Teacher: let me guess the lion?
Student: No! The giraffe because He's in a fridge.
Teacher: WOW!
Student: Sally has to get across a large river home to many alligators. They are very dangerous, but Sally swims across safely. How?
Teacher: Sally stepped on the alligators mouth?
Student: The gators are at the party.
Student: But Sally dies anyway. Why?
Teacher: She drowned?!
Student: No! She got hit in the head by a flying brick.
Random person: Imma smack you so hard your skin pigment changes!
Me: Who the hell do you think you are? Michael Jackson’s dad?
A random guy yelled at me, "Hey, sl*t!" I walked towards him. "I prefer slit." I said. "Why?" He asked. "You see this wrists?" I spat at him.
So I was looking though my pictures and I found a picture of a random kids that took a picture of his ugly face it look like someone that got hit by a car than a bus than a semi
That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad
I was talking to my friends and they said a random topic about cats and I'm like "Water you talking about" =3
What does e = I don’t know Abunch of random numbers but e=mc2
Random guy: come on bin laden, time is ticking. Get it, ticking. OK I'll leave.
A mother and her 7 year old child are walking in the grocery story. The young boy then screams to a random woman “ your an ugly bitch”. The mother grabs her son, and says “ I’m so sorry, I must have told him a thousand of times to not judge people on how they look.
I have fun goin on dem roller coasters that go really high up and sittin by random people and once we get to the high point I look at the stranger and go wham and unplug they seat bealt
Person: i'd really like it if you'd stop saying my name all the time Random Person: Cheesus! That hurt Person: SERIOUSLY!?!?!
