Question jokes
A salamander came by me the other day and he AXOLOTL questions. Ba dum tss!!!
What do you call an orphan if every other orphan gets picked?
Someone: Ugly?
Me: No, trick question, they are still an orphan.
POV: You walk up to your short friend and say, "How is the weather down there?"
Teacher's pen is RED, our pen is BLUE, she is marking an EGG on my marksheet, left with questions and no CLUE.
Why is Lucas so weird? I don't know, you tell me.
Someone forgot to do half the questions in the history test.
And that's what made him go down in history.
What do you say to a depressed special kid?
“Why so down?”
Kid: Wanna hear a joke?
Me: Sure.
Kid: Why diddncjcjcbfjcbcjdbbskzmzj b b j no?
Me:?
Teacher: At the end of this ruler is an idiot.
Student: Which end?
What looks like half a cat?
The other half.
A bus full of nuns die in a car crash and end up at the pearly gates where Saint Peter greets them, "Hello sisters, welcome to heaven. Before you enter, I must ask you all a question." He asks the first nun, "Have you ever touched a penis?" Well, she said, "Just once, with the tip of my little finger." "Ok, dip it in the holy water and you can enter." He repeats the question to the second nun. Well, she says, "I might of held one once." "Ok," says St. Peter, "wash your hands in the holy water and you can enter." Just then, there's a commotion down the line. One nun is trying to push in front of another. St. Peter says, "Sister Susan, there is no rush, you will get in." "That's fine," she replies, "but if I have to gargle that stuff, I want to get in before Sister Mary sticks her arse in it."
A guy starts chatting to a pretty woman at a party.
Seeing that she didn't back off, he asked her name. "Carmen," she replied. "That's a nice name," he said, warming up the conversation. "Who named you, your mother?"
"No, I named myself," she answered.
"Oh, that's interesting. Why Carmen?"
"Because I like cars, and I like men," she said, looking directly into his eyes. "So what's your name?" she asked.
‘BJ Titsngolf’
A kid asks his dad why his name is Experience. The dad says, "That's what we give our mistakes."
What do you call a?
I walk up to a kid. I ask where his parents are, and he started crying. Then I walked out of the orphanage.
"Have you taken a bath?"
"No. Why, did one go missing?"
Question: Why does my teenage brother wear a cape to bed?
Answer: Because he can't sleep in his race car bed...
Want to hear an abortion joke, or any joke for that matter? You have that option, and you can thank your mother for that.
But that's a question that will never be heard by an aborted unborn baby, whose only option was death. And that's no joke.
Who the heck is Kristie?
You: What do you call a door knob without the lock?
Me: I don't know.
You: Are you sure?
Me: I don't know.
You: Okay.