Why are orphans so bad at poker?
They don't know what a full house is.
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Cause they come back.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Girls are like rocks; the flat ones get skipped.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
If you hit an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If you hit an orphan with a car, at least you don't have to tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
What does an orphan call a family photo? A selfie.
Why was the orphan a big success? Cause people say go big or go home, he only had one option.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common? They can’t see their parents.
Why can't orphans hear about ancient Egypt? Because they don’t know what a mummy is.
Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do gorillas get all the "pussy" from? The strip club, which is called "Poker Kong Night."
What did the orphan poker player say to the elder?
“Will you raise me?”
Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.
A pedophile is sitting at an empty poker table. An eight-year-old kid asked him if he could sit down. The pedophile says to the child, "Sure, let's play."
Why can't orphans play poker?
Because they don't know what a full house is.
Why can't fat kids play poker?
They eat all the chips.
The QUEEN took a shit at the poker table it was a ROYAL FLUSH
Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.
Why can't you play poker in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs!
Stephen Hawking was incredible at poker, he had no tell whatsoever.
A guy walks up to a girl. He says, "Hey, you want a poker? I’ve got one."
My friend and I were playing Poker... And my friend also beat me with Jackass.
Why do butts always win at poker?
They always hold the best PAIRS!
How do you beat lady gaga at Texas hold’em?
Poker face
I aced my poker test...
my teacher asked me to reflect on my work, so I got a mirror...
A caffeinated vampire goes to sleep in a coffee-n...
do you get my puns... no, because you can't seem to get a grasp on how bad they are...
Why does my cheating ex-wife wear a colostomy bag?
She lost her ass playing poker...
Why was the booty so good at poker?
Because it always had a good PAIR.
Dolly Parton and Queen Elizabeth went to the Pearly Gates on the same day.
They both met with an Angel to find out if they would be admitted to Heaven.
The angel said, "Unfortunately, there's only one space in Heaven today, so I must decide which one of you will be admitted."
The Angel asked Dolly if there was some particular reason why she should go to Heaven.
Dolly took off her top and said, "Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I'm sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity."
The Angel thanked Dolly and asked Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth, the same question.
The Queen walked over to a toilet, pulled the lever, and flushed it without saying a word.
The Angel immediately said, "OK, your Majesty, you may go into Heaven."
Dolly was outraged and asked, "What was that all about? I showed you two of God's own perfect creations, and you turned me down. She simply flushed a commode, and she got admitted to Heaven! Would you explain that to me?"
"Sorry, Dolly," said the Angel, "but even in Heaven, a royal flush beats a pair - no matter how big they are."
