No jokes
What do you call a guy with no body and nose?
No body nose
Bro, why are you making an avalanche by that big forehead? No wonder why snow was found on Mars.
Michael Jackson and Jeffrey Epstein walk into a bar. But a few minutes later, they would walk out, because you have to be 21+. No room for those two.
The South Tower proposed to the North Tower, but he said no.
Why was Saudi Arabia sad during 9/11?
Because there were no more planes.
What’s the best part about stage four cancer?
There’s no stage five.
The interviewer asked me if I had a criminal record when I was requesting Australian citizenship.
I replied, "No. Is that still required?"
I’m not saying my life’s a joke. I’m saying it’s the punchline no one asked for.
What does every pirate hate?
A small chest with no booty.
My wife treats me like God!
She takes no notice of my existence until she wants something.
If a stork brings white babies, and a blackbird black babies, what bird brings no babies?
A swallow.
The girl asks her boyfriend, "Are you jealous of my heart?"
He says, "No."
She says, "Because it's pumping in me and you're not."
I have no problem with prostitution.
It's like an Air BnB for your dick.
What do you call an @EB with no ears?
An Explain B.
Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?
Because they have no Father's or Mother's days.
No matter how lonely you get, you have Explain Bear.
Explain Bear is always there for you.
Hey, do you know who Dragon248 is? No, who is he? He's dragging these balls off your face.
I tried to rape Amy Winehouse, but she said, "No! No! No!"
Mom: Go clean your room, Little Johnny.
Little Johnny: No, it’s my room.
Mom: Well, it’s my house.
Little Johnny: Then go clean it.
Mom: Go to school!
At school:
Teacher: Hi, Little Johnny. You’re late.
Little Johnny: Watch because my son of a bitch mom told me to clean her room. I told her no, it’s my room, and then she said, 'Well, it’s my house.' Then I said, 'Go clean it,' and then she told me to go to school.
Teacher: Johnny, go to the principal’s office! You just came into school and now you're causing trouble. Go!
What do you say to a woman in a wheelchair with no arms or legs?
"Nice tits."