Monarchy jokes
Why can't the USA and England play chess?
USA has no towers and England has no queen.
This chess game against America and England is getting interesting. First, America lost both of its towers, but now England has lost its queen.
What's the difference between Freddie Mercury and Princess Diana?
Freddie lived long enough to be a Queen.
Why doesn’t the US want to play chess with the UK?
The US is already down 2 towers, and the UK has an unkillable queen.
What does a queen want on her cookie?
Royal Icing.
Did the people of England see a "game over" sign in the sky when the queen died?
Why can’t orphans play baseball? They ain’t got no home to run to.
Why can’t England people play chess? They ain’t got no queen.
5, 4, 3, 2, 1. A castle weighs a ton. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. The Queen of England's won! I never thought she'd get it done, but her sister is a nun.
What type of tea do you drink with the Queen of England?
Royal-tea.
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that lives with the royal family?
Rolls Royce.
Queen Elizabeth came back before your dad did.
What’s Queen Elizabeth’s pickup line?
You’re breathtaking!
The Ruler of Varvona wanted a fruitcake, but his subjects showed up at his castle with a Christian instead.
And he said: "NO, NO, NO! YOU IMBECILES! NOT THAT KIND OF FRUITCAKE!"
Why can't British people play chess?
Because they lost their queen.
When you turn 100, you get a letter from the Queen. When you turn 16, you get a DM from Prince Andrew.
What's the difference between the Queen's death and Princess Diana's death? The Queen died in peace, not pieces.
TommyInnit said, "Long live the Queen." Look at where she's at now.
Due to her death, you can no longer get a letter from the Queen when you turn 100.
Instead, you now receive a text from Prince Andrew when you turn 14.
Long live the quee—Oh wait...
What did kings say when they were made king?
Allah ail (All hail) [insert name here]!