Mission jokes
As a son, I like sports, and I watch sports with my mom. So one day, we were looking at football. My mom asked me who makes the most money. I said the quarterback.
My mom told me I'm going to get a quarterback as my new boyfriend, and it'll be your new stepfather. A week later, my mom went out. I came home, and I see my mom making out with a high school kid. I said, "What's going on?" My mom said, "Look, my new boyfriend and new stepfather is the high school quarterback." My mom said, "See, mission accomplished." I said, "Yeah, job well done."
Why was my mate in "Mission: Impossible?" Because he couldn't find his dad.
How do NASA plan parades?
They plan-et.
What's NASA's grossest mission?
Probing Uranus.
What's the grossest mission NASA could do?
Probing Uranus.
What's similar between a fetus and a failed mission?
You abort it.
I've sadly received a rejection letter from NASA. Strangely, it says there's no space on their training program.
Your hairline is so far back, Paw Patrol couldn't finish their mission.
So Jesus has been nailed to the cross.
On the first day, he starts to moan, "Peter, Peter!"
Well, Peter hears Jesus moaning and feels it is important, so begins to go up the hill. On his way, he is met by some Roman soldiers and they proceed to beat his ass back down the hill.
On the second day, Peter hears Jesus moaning again, "Peter, Peter!"
Peter thinks to himself, this is important. He heads up the hill, fights past the first line, but gets a beatdown by the second group and back down the hill he goes.
On the third day, Peter is woken up by Jesus sounding very weak, but calling out, "Peter, Peter!"
Peter feels that whatever it is that Jesus needs him for must be very important. Peter heads up the hill, he is on a mission. He manages to fight his way thru three sets of Roman guards and make his way to the cross Jesus has been nailed to for three days. He looks up to Jesus and says, "Jesus, I have heard your calls, what is so important?"
Jesus- "Peter, I can see your house from here!"
Community talk
The year was 2022. In a dark corner of the internet, there existed worstjokesever.com, a website filled with the most cringe-worthy jokes one could imagine. Among the members, a deeply disturbed individual named Ashton Parks roamed freely, lurking in the shadows. However, unbeknownst to the other users, Ashton's presence spun a horrifying web that extended far beyond the world of jokes.
Ashton, with his cunning ways… Read more