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Shitpost master-general · 10 months ago

An anime-style illustration shows a man and a woman in a close, intimate embrace. The woman, Mikasa Ackerman, has dark hair and is smiling subtly while looking towards the viewer. The man, Levi Ackerman, also with dark hair, leans into her, appearing intense. Above the image, white text on a black background reads: "WHEN YOU ARE OUT IN A RESTAURANT WITH YOUR COUSIN AND THEY SAY THEY HAVE A 40% DISCOUNT ON COUPLES". A small watermark "TAPIOCA Memes" is visible in the bottom left corner of the image.

Offer

Heroin Monkey · 10 months ago

A screenshot of an online marketplace interface. The text reads: "Your offer wasn't accepted. Make a new offer?" Below that, the item's "Price" is listed as "US $350.00", the "Previous Offer" as "US $20.00", and the "Message from seller" states: "You should be shot."

Hand

Shitpost master-general · 10 months ago

A four-panel comic strip. In the first panel, a pink-shirted man tells a blue-hoodie man, "Oh, I don't shake hands. I'm a germaphobe." In the second panel, the pink-shirted man asks, "How 'bout a fist-bump!" as they perform a fist-bump. In the third panel, a green-shirted man approaches the blue-hoodie man, who is walking away, and asks, "Dude! Was that anal-fisting-porn-star legend, Johnny Shit-Knuckles?!" The pink-shirted man looks on in surprise. In the fourth panel, the pink-shirted man has a look of extreme horror and disgust, realizing who he just fist-bumped.

Dolphin

Big Jim · 10 months ago

Any suggestions? Anything helps

A picture shows a deer swimming in blue water. The text below the image reads: 'I think my dolphin has autism'.

Clothing

Willy b · 10 months ago

President

Big Jim · 10 months ago

🫡

A black and white image depicting two men shaking hands. The man on the left, with a beard and a hat, resembles Abraham Lincoln. The man on the right is a Black man, looking towards Lincoln. The text overlaid on the image reads: "President Abraham Lincoln meets the first freed slave after the signing The Emancipation Proclamation in 1863:".

Short People

Willy b · 10 months ago

The top half of the image features a 'TOP DEFINITION' headline stating 'National throw short people day' with the description below: 'On October 21, you can throw anyone under 5'4" with no permission needed'. The bottom half shows a close-up of Gimli, the dwarf character from Lord of the Rings, looking surprised and wide-eyed with his mouth slightly agape, possibly in shock or alarm. A 'CocoFun' watermark is in the bottom right corner.

Godzilla

Willy b · 10 months ago

A large Christmas decoration in the form of the character Godzilla is displayed in a shopping mall. The Godzilla figure is covered in Christmas lights and wears a Santa hat. Close-up images show Godzilla with glowing red eyes and breathing a mist, resembling its atomic breath. The text overlay reads: 'Japan is still trying to figure out Christmas.'

Motorcycle

Willy b · 10 months ago

A person stands with their back to the camera, wearing a black leather jacket. On the back of the jacket is a large circular patch. The patch features a central image of a skeleton wearing a hat and riding a motorcycle. Above the central image, the text reads "SONS OF ALZHEIMER". Below the central image, the text reads "WHERE'S MY BIKE?".

Pumpkin

Big Jim · 10 months ago

Y he look like dat

A large orange pumpkin sits on a kitchen counter, partially carved. It has small, round eyes and a wide, gaping mouth, giving it a goofy or startled expression. The lower part of the mouth carving is left thick, resembling a chin or lower jaw. In the background, carving tools, a bowl of pumpkin seeds, and a bat-shaped carving template are visible, suggesting the carving process is underway.

Chili Pepper

Willy b · 10 months ago

A white image with black text at the top asking, "How do you measure how heavy a red hot chili pepper is?" Below it, the answer reads, "Give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it a weigh now." The bottom half of the image features a close-up photo of several bright red chili peppers hanging from a vibrant green plant, surrounded by lush leaves.

Dog

Willy b · 10 months ago

A photograph captures a cloud formation in the sky resembling a dog, possibly a corgi, leaping or running. Below the cloud, the sun or moon shines brightly. The text overlay reads: "I have literally waited my entire lifetime to see this...".

Ring

Heroin Monkey · 10 months ago

Man

Heroin Monkey · 10 months ago

A black and white image features Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in a dark, textured suit, looking directly forward with a serious expression. Overlayed text in yellow reads "HOW TO BECOME A TOP 1% MAN", followed by a bulleted list of absurd advice in white, pink, and green. The list includes: "ONLY P*RN", "10L WATER", "WORKOUT (NO BREAKS) - 3X ARM DAY - 2X LEG DAY - 4X BUTTHOLE DAY", "READ BOOKS", "READ BOOKS AGAIN", "ASSEMBLE UNCLES", "300X DAIRY INTAKE", "12 HOURS GRINDING", "ABSORB DETROIT". A small username "@entopranure" is visible at the top.

Kid

Shitpost master-general · 10 months ago

A four-panel comic strip. In the first panel, a creepy man in a trench coat, with hairy legs visible, says "HEY KID!" to a small girl holding an ice cream cone on a sidewalk. In the second panel, the man opens his trench coat to the girl, who has dropped her ice cream, standing between his legs. In the third panel, a woman screams in terror, her eyes wide with horror. In the fourth panel, the man's trench coat is open, revealing he is wearing a green T-shirt that says "THE TIME IS NOW. GO VEGAN." He has a large, unsettling smile. The watermark "@TONYBTS2" is visible in the first panel.

Elf

Shitpost master-general · 10 months ago

A Twitter (now X) post from user Pol Atreides (@Aliathewhite) which reads: 'This is like : Elves / Orcs'. Below this tweet is an older tweet from the same user, linking to 'x.com/BeatAntiWhitis...' and displaying two side-by-side images of women. The left image shows a fair-skinned woman with freckles and natural features. The right image is a mugshot of a dark-skinned woman with elaborate 'baby hair' styling, heavy makeup, long eyelashes, green contact lenses, and a lip piercing.

Vlad the Impaler

Willy b · 10 months ago

A portrait of Vlad the Impaler, a historical figure from the 15th century, is shown. He has long, dark hair, a mustache, and wears a red and gold ornate hat with pearls. The text overlaid on the image reads, "HALLOWEEN YARD DECORATION CHAMPION, 1456-1462".

Hitler

Shitpost master-general · 10 months ago

This is so relatable :3

A split image. On the left is a close-up illustration of a pink and purple anthropomorphic fox character with large, expressive eyes, labeled "Sensitive femboy fox." On the right is a black and white portrait of Adolf Hitler in a uniform, labeled "Hitler." Above both images, in white text on a black background, it reads "I HAVE 2 SIDES."

Food

Shitpost master-general · 10 months ago

An animated image depicts an elderly woman with white hair and glasses, wearing a blue dress, sitting in a large green armchair. She is casually tossing bundles of green money from a basket labeled "MONEY TO BURN" into a fireplace. Above the scene, the text reads "Buying food".

Squirrel

Anonymous prankster /\ _ /\ · 10 months ago

that thing found so crack!

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