Worst Jokes Ever

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Worst Jokes Ever

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Why should you care

The image shows a grumpy-looking cat with a caption. The text reads, 'LIKE A GOOD NEIGHBOR STAY OVER THERE'.

Why should you care

really is there

The left panel shows a man with a confused expression and text overlay that reads, "Too much garlic"? What's next? Too much love? Too much desire? The right panel features four stone head figures that are reacting to an event which is described in text above the image as 'Four of my toes watching the little toe take a coffee table leg to the face.'

Alastor Wade.

Me when I’m trying to fall asleep:

A cartoon image of a character with red hair, sharp teeth, and a red suit holding a glass of champagne. Speech bubbles say: "If you think about it... Thinking about thinking is the hardest sort of thinking there is."

Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of a conversation. The first message asks to tell a joke using every letter of the alphabet. The second message responds with an alphabet and a cheese pun.

Anonymous

Shitpost-master general

The image shows a Ring doorbell notification that says, "There is motion at your Front Door." Below the notification is a grayscale image of a cat holding a fan of dollar bills.

𝓼𝓸𝓷 𝓰𝓸𝓴𝓾

Heroin Monkey

A black and white comic strip depicting Darth Vader telling someone, presumably his son, about his conception. The text reads: "I AM YOUR FATHER! NO! No, that's impossible! Actually, it's very possible. I think it's time we had "the talk". You see, I stuck my penis into your mom's vagina. From there I- 20 long minutes later... Then I went uhhhh gghha aaa! Oh, BABY! And that's how you were created. I...I don't know how to take this all in. That's what your mom said LAST NIGHT! NOOOOOO!"

Heroin Monkey

The image shows two pictures. The first picture shows a train on a bridge in a mountainous area. There is text below it stating, "Switzerland's military has remained neutral since 1815, but the entire country is rigged to explode. Thousands of demolition points are wired into bridges, highways, and railroads across the nation so that everything can be destroyed if invaders attack". The second picture shows a man holding a belt with a worried expression. The text below the man states, "WHO'S THERE? I HAVE A BELT AND I'M NOT AFRAID TO HANG MYSELF".

Anonymous

A screenshot of a tweet that reads: "I hate it when I say 'suck my dick' and people say 'Oh but you don't have a dick,' you fools. Blithering idiots. I mean my soul dick. My metaphorical penis. I don't have a physical penis protruding from my body but the aura is there. Suck my spirit dick, peasant."

Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of a forum where the first user argues that arrays should start at one and that there can never be 0 of anything. The second user replies with the question: "Number of women you've slept with"

Anonymous

💀

Anonymous

The image is divided into two panels. The left panel shows Mark Zuckerberg with a serious expression, accompanied by text that reads "That COVID meme violates community guidelines. You are banned." The right panel shows a smiling Mark Zuckerberg with glasses, and the text says, "Yea bro I agree! There are only TWO GENDERS!"

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a circular flow diagram. It starts with the text "I wake up", then an arrow points to a picture of a cat and multiple packages of Natural American Spirit cigarettes and the text "maybe 5 packs of cigs will help". Another arrow leads to "post silly things online" and then to "there is something wrong with me" before going back to "I wake up".

Evil Duck Lords Of America

The image is a six-panel comic strip. In the first panel, a yellow duck stands alone, and the text reads, "There is no grim reaper." In the second panel, the same duck stands with the text, "There is only the duck of death." In the third panel, the duck is walking, and the text says, "At the end he waddles in and claims your soul." In the fourth panel, a Grim Reaper is next to text that reads, "We only made up the grim reaper so you wouldn't feel so stupid about being killed by a duck." In the fifth panel, the duck stands with the text "But it's really just going to be this cute." In the final panel, the same duck is pulling a person by their foot. The person is lying on the ground with the text, "Please don't be all angry about this. It's just the way it is."

Unimportant Intelligence

Good being

The image shows a list titled "10 Fun Facts." The facts include instructions that lead the reader to check their own behavior, such as breathing with their tongue out, checking if they skipped number 5, and realizing they have been tricked. The text at the bottom says, "Share this with friends and leave a like."

αmy

charmin bear pearly harbor?

The image shows a phone screen displaying a video and underneath comments. The text on top reads, "and the bear is like:". The comments mention, "in one of the commercials they show a bear TSA which implies that there was a Charmin bear 9/11." Another comment says, "Ain't no way" and a final comment asks "was there also a Charmin bear Hitler?"

Wade

Guide to surviving Scream(1996)

The image displays the text: "The Rules of Surviving a Horror Movie in Scream (1996). According to Wes Craven's horror slasher movie Scream (1996), these are the rules to surviving a horror movie: 1. Never say "who's there". 2. Don't have sex. 3. Don't drink or do drugs. 4. Never say "I'll be right back". 5. Everyone is a suspect. 6. Never go out to investigate a strange noise. Bonus: The supposedly dead killer may come back to life in the end for one final scare." On the right, there is a depiction of the Ghostface mask.

AG

A chimpanzee with a comical expression and wide open mouth. The text says: "Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you'll find a brain back there."

Wade

Halo

The top panel shows General Grievous asking General Kenobi about the state of r/gaming. The bottom panel shows General Kenobi looking surprised with the text "HALO there" overlaid.

The Radio Demon

love problems for smart dinosaurs pack 1

A green dinosaur with a thoughtful expression is the central image. The text on top reads, "If love is blind," and the text at the bottom asks, "Then why is there love at first sight?"

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