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Jokes
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Theft memes

Post meme

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AI

Heroin Monkey · 4 months ago

A screenshot of a post showing a man with glasses and a beanie holding a large blue mug. The text overlay asks if he is afraid of AI taking his job, then retorts that AI can't steal wallets, concluding with the phrase "Glory to Romania".

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Cookie

Shitpost master-general · 4 months ago

Cookie theft is worse than hitler

A screenshot of a Reddit comment thread. User Aggravating_Drag705 writes, "i once stole a cookie from my sister". User Cultural-Proposal-34 replies, "worse than hitler".

Santa

Shitpost master-general · 7 months ago

A cartoon image shows Santa Claus standing next to a reindeer whose legs have been replaced with cinder blocks. Santa, looking exasperated, is saying, "I TOLD YOU NOT TO STOP IN JACKSONVILLE." The background depicts a snowy urban scene with buildings.

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Grocery

Heroin Monkey · 7 months ago

A top-down shot of a large amount of groceries laid out on a table, including boxes of cereal, packaged meats (chicken and beef), bags of snacks (Cheez-It, chips), canned goods (tuna, crushed tomatoes, green beans), cartons of milk, jugs of water, and other various food items. Above the image, text reads: "@entrapanure here's what $0 gets you at a grocery store if you're not a pussy".

Flag

Creed (shit isnt availabe) · 1 year ago

A diagram shows the flag of the United States above a legend. The legend uses colored squares and text to represent parts of the flag. A blue square is labeled 'Land theft'. A white square is labeled 'Slavery'. A red square is labeled 'Genocide'. A green square is labeled 'Winning wars against Vietnamese farmers'.

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Copy

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A photo of a car with a shattered window. The text on the image says: "Be careful out there everyone. I had 2 copies of Concord in my car and someone broke in and left 4 more."

Credit Card

Anonymous · 1 year ago

The image shows a phone notification from Chime indicating a declined transaction at Papa John's due to insufficient funds, followed by a picture of a dejected-looking man representing the credit card thief.

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GTA VI

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A man with a serious face is looking towards the camera. The text "Me leaving the store with GTA VI in my mouth" is visible above him.

Body

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A picture of Cristiano Ronaldo with a smug smile. Above him, there is text saying: "when my car gets stolen but realise the body in the trunk is not my problem anymore."

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Game

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image contains white text on a black background. The text reads: "You've heard of Grand Theft Auto, now get ready for stealy wheely automobiley."

FBI

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

An image macro with text over a scene from the movie 'Kung Fu Panda' featuring Master Oogway. The top text describes a highly specific and bizarre scenario: 'When the FBI kicks down your door while you beating your meat to the 500 terabytes of polygender midget furry austismic monkey porn that you stole'. The bottom text, which is the character's line, reads: 'My time has come'.

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Camera

Jfkisafk · 2 years ago

Help he took my gopro

A man with a distorted face is looking into the camera. He's wearing a red hoodie and black pants. The background appears to be a room with wooden floors and a white door.

Meme

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A four-panel image showing the Lorax character. In the first panel, the Lorax states "I am the Lorax and I speak for the trees." In the second panel, the Lorax says "The trees and I must discuss about this meme you posted." The third panel shows a tree and a small Lorax saying "steal it" and the small lorax replying "kk". In the fourth panel, the Lorax says "The trees say this meme is now mine."

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Seagull

Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a news headline about a pensioner killing a seagull for stealing his chip. There are two photos of the pensioner and a drawing depicting the seagull splattered on the wall. Below is the text: "SHOULDN'T OF PINCHED ME CHIP, SIMPLE AS". There are also crying wojak characters.

Prime

Jjisfunny2011 · 3 years ago

me when someone steals my prime

Homer Simpson is taking a bath and Bart is standing behind him, holding a chair as if he's going to hit Homer.