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Wife

1 view · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
A sculpture of Winnie the Pooh and Piglet is holding a honey pot. Winnie the Pooh is reaching out with a long arm to grab it. The text reads: "Give me all of your bee syrup now. Please don't take it from me, my wife is pregnant."
  • 0
  • Home

    1 view · BigDaveFan · 2 years ago
    A white paper with black text and a simple black drawing of a figure with a long nose. The text reads: "It's MY home, God gave me the right to make it a tomb for federal agents or thieves."
  • 2
  • Goose

    1 view · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    A man in a military uniform with a black beret holding two guns. The text above the man reads "Me on my way to the local park to remind geese that it is man who is made in Gods image."
  • 0
  • Animal

    5 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    The image shows text above a photo of a cow stuck in a metal structure, with the name "pablo" written on the bottom. The text says "Step 1: Google animals stuck in weird places. Step 2: Give it a common Spanish name. Step 3: Profit."
  • 0
  • Vlad the Impaler

    5 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    A painting of Vlad the Impaler wearing a red hat and ornate clothing, with the text "It's never too late to follow your dreams. Vlad the Impaler didn't even start impaling people until his mid-30s."
  • 0
  • Man

    63 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    The text "The Gire" in blue is above a definition that reads, "When a man inserts a pocket pussy into another dude's asshole before having sex with him so it's not gay."
  • 0
  • Introvert

    1 view · trixiedixie🥰 · 2 years ago
    Three animated figures with dark hair and wearing matching dark jackets stand in front of a light gray background. The text above them reads, "Introverts when they finally go outside". Below them are two speech bubbles with the text, "Oh!" and "It's soil!"
  • 0
  • Corn

    2 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    The image shows a sphere of corn on a blue background with the text "NEW! CORN ON THE ORB" and "It's round now!".
  • 0
  • Sex

    62 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    A screenshot from Pornhub displaying a post. The post asks, "If you have sex on Halloween, is it a monster mash or a graveyard smash?" A reply below states, "It's only a graveyard smash if she's had an abortion."
  • 0
  • Corpse

    53 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    The image is a two-panel meme. The first panel shows a man working on a waterbed with the text "LIFE HACK: If you fuck a corpse on a waterbed, it feels like they are participating. You're welcome." The second panel shows a close-up of Gordon Ramsay looking disgusted.
  • 1
  • Nose

    6 views · Silly Sonka · 2 years ago

    ITS THE APOCALYPSE

    A collage of a man with an astonished expression next to the character "Woody" from Toy Story who has a stone head, in the Buzz Lightyear costume. The text says "And that's why noses run and feet smell."
  • 0
  • Pokemon card

    27 views · Wade · 2 years ago
    A Pokemon card featuring a plush shark toy labeled "May" as a basic Pokemon with 30 HP. The card includes attacks named "Suicidal Karen" and "Victimize," and the text reads, "If you come across this Pokémon in the wild, RUN. Run away immediately, kill it if you can, but fuckin RUN."
  • 11
  • Compliment

    4 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

    This is so bad

    A screenshot of two tweets. The first tweet is from Caitlyn Jenner, it reads "It's so hard to find a straight man that is confident enough to compliment me on my looks.". The second tweet is a reply from Donald J. Trump, and it reads "Nice balls."
  • 0
  • Egg

    14 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    Two tweets are shown. The first tweet says: "Imagine walking 2km to hatch an egg and it turning out to be a fucking magikarp." The second tweet is by user Magikarp The Fish saying: "imagine waiting nine months to give birth and it's you"
  • 0
  • Shit

    24 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    The image shows a text written on a wall or stall. The text reads: "I once took a shit in this stall, so thick and so firm it stood tall, it balanced on end that shit did not bend but fell over and scraped my left ball."
  • 0
  • Existence

    2 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    The image shows a frog with a distorted, glowing outline and the text "existence is meaningless" above it and "my dudes" below it. Next to it there is a man looking at his phone smiling, with the text "lol it is" next to him.
  • 0
  • Family

    18 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    The image is a box of the board game "Whose Line Is It Anyway?" with a picture on the box of two kids. On the play area, there are multiple lines of white powder and a credit card, suggesting drug use.
  • 0
  • Father

    15 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    A black and white comic strip depicting Darth Vader telling someone, presumably his son, about his conception. The text reads: "I AM YOUR FATHER! NO! No, that's impossible! Actually, it's very possible. I think it's time we had "the talk". You see, I stuck my penis into your mom's vagina. From there I- 20 long minutes later... Then I went uhhhh gghha aaa! Oh, BABY! And that's how you were created. I...I don't know how to take this all in. That's what your mom said LAST NIGHT! NOOOOOO!"
  • 0
  • Communism

    17 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    A person puts their hand on their face in a gesture of disbelief or frustration. Above them is a list of countries associated with communism, and a statement saying "When someone on reddit tells you communism is great but that... just did it wrong".
  • 0
  • Uno

    11 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago
    A Twitter post from user 'wanye' with the text, "uno is based on luck unless I win then it's based on strategy and I'm a genius." The date of the tweet is 20/07/2020.
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