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Shit

36 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A Capri Sun drink pouch with the text "Damn this shit kinda hydrating." "I NEED her bouncing and moaning on it." and "The Federal Government must fall."

Calvin

41 views · Thoughtless · 2 years ago

Remember when Calvin wanted to commit a school shooting?

A cartoon drawing on a sheet of notebook paper shows a boy named Calvin drawing himself in a tank. He draws himself firing the tank at a school building where kids are jumping out the window. Miss Wormwood comes to stop him. In the last panel, Calvin's teacher Miss Wormwood is shown taking a drawing from a student and making a comment about public schools.

Money

11 views · Blach66.1 · 2 years ago

A screenshot of the Google Play Store page for the Kuda money app, which is advertised as being for Africans. Text overlaid on the image questions the phrasing, suggesting the app is for "Africans for money".

X-ray

1 view · Wade XL · 2 years ago

The image shows three panels. The first one is titled "Original" and shows a cartoon of SpongeBob and Patrick from the cover of a Nickelodeon book called "The Great Ice Cream Caper". The second panel, titled "X-ray", shows a simple cartoon of SpongeBob with a red tie but with his internal organs exposed. The last panel shows the same image but with more details in his internal organs. The text "How do we know it's not actually..." is written at the top of the last two panels.

Life

2 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows the development of a person through four stages of life. In the first picture, the figure is an old man with a hat standing next to a door, the second picture is a man sitting on a chair with a question mark, and the third picture is a man kneeling with a stressed expression, the last picture is a boy drawing on an easel. The text "It starts with" is at the top. The text "one thing" is near the beginning. The text "I don't know why" is above the next picture. The text "It doesn't even matter how hard you try" is above the last picture.

Wheelchair

16 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A cartoon of King Julien in a wheelchair with the text: "Mauricio I can't. I can't move it move it anymore."

it's

25 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

1) buy a lobster
[deleted] by
My friend is in forensics and works on crime
scenes. They find a woman laying on the
bathroom floor with a head wound and live
baby shrimp on the floor with a smell of burnt
residue. After 3 days of investigation, they
figured out what happened.
Long story short, she bought a lobster from
the market. In the market, they feed the
lobster live baby shrimp until they're sold. This
woman brings the lobster home, inserts the
lobster's tail into her vagina, lights a lighter
and puts the flame towards the lobster's head,
so the lobster will frantically start shaking his
tail (which is inside her vagina), giving her the
jollies. Apparently she killed the lobster from
burning his head too long, the lobster, being
dead, voids his bowels, causing this lobster to
shit live baby shrimp into her vagina. This
woman then goes to pee and sees live baby
shrimp crawling out of her vagina, she freaks
out, falls, and cracks her head open on the
bathtub and dies.
it happened in Chicago in 2001
?
---
14
1) wait for horny
Chicago 2001
"Lobster Love" Incident

Account

13 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The first part shows a tweet from the National Park Service stating: "You know it's cold outside when you go outside and it's cold." Below that is a reply from heychrisjones stating "Who is running this account?" The second part shows a reply from the National Park Service that contains an image. The image shows a marmot wearing a headset and sitting at a computer in an office setting.

Floor

2 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

Video

112 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

$The image shows a video with 5 figures resembling Hitler standing on a white bed. The figures wear similar brown coats with red, green, and purple variations. Above the video, there is a text saying, "Me: \"Why do I keep on having strange thoughts? It's almost like I'm going crazy.\" The videos I watch at 2 am:". Below the video, there is the text "5 Little Hitlers are jumping on the bed".$

Hello There

13 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The meme shows a text conversation where a "pretty girl" says "Hello there ;)". The user's brain repeats "don't say it" multiple times. The bottom part of the image shows General Grievous, a character from Star Wars, in a screenshot, implying that the user couldn't resist saying "Hello there".

Alien

9 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image is split into two parts. The top part features a handwritten note that says, "If an alien came to visit, I would kill it. By Bella". Below is a black and white image of a stern-looking man with a Hello Kitty bow in his hair.

Truck

12 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a comparison of two images of trucks with the text 'how it started' and 'how it's going' written above it. The first image on the left shows a white truck with its front hood open and two cartoon hands pointing at the vehicle. The second image on the right shows two trucks in a romantic embrace, framed by a red heart. The image also has the user name "dexter" and the handle "@DexterSoWhat" and the text "So now even trucks getting more love than me?"

Rug

13 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a black doormat with white text that reads, "it's MY home, God gave me the right to make it a tomb for federal agents or thieves", and below the text is a cartoonish drawing of a person. Above the doormat is a text that reads, "The rug I ordered 6 months ago finally came in lmao."

Location

13 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A still from a cartoon shows Candace and her mother looking surprised and slightly confused at a parking lot. The text says: "BUT, BUT, BU.. IT WAS RIGHT HERE!"

Author

11 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The meme shows three different people. The first panel shows J.K. Rowling, with the text "Has a good idea and writes a book". The second panel shows George R.R. Martin, with the text "Has a good idea and writes a book". The third panel shows J.R.R. Tolkien, with the text "Creates a language, feels like it needs a story and writes a book".

Relationship

17 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A painting of Romeo and Juliet on a balcony, with text on the right side. The text reads: 'Romeo & Juliet is not a love story. It's a 3-day relationship between a 13yr old and a 17yr old that caused 6 deaths. Sincerely, Everyone Who Actually Read It.'

Corner

3 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a text list titled 'Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator'. The list provides humorous and absurd actions to perform inside an elevator.

N word

23 views · Wade XL · 2 years ago

The image shows a screenshot with text at the top and a man with a shocked expression at the bottom. The text reads: "technically you can call a black guy the n word and I came up with this theory and it's called NROENB it's stands for NO Rasicts Or Equality Not Both. So my theory is that if black ppl call each other the n word then because they want Equality it means that Whites can call Blacks the n word Whites can call Whites the n word Blacks can call Whites the n word Blacks can call Blacks the n word. And Asians are somewhere in the middle."

Corner

17 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A list of ten things to do in an elevator. The text reads: Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator. 1. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. 2. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?" 3. Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!" 4. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking. 5. Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on". 6. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly. 7. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral. 8. Dress up as the devil and then ask other people as they get in, "Going down?" 9. Drag a desk into the elevator. Ask "Do you have an appointment?" 10. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."

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