Worst Jokes Ever

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Worst Jokes Ever

House Memes

Heroin Monkey

A photo shows a doll that resembles an unborn baby next to text that reads: "If I was a girl, I would get pregnant as many times as possible, then have abortions after the third month of being pregnant so I would deliver a potato sized 1/3 developed dead fetus, then I would take the fetus, put it in a jar of preservative liquid and put it on a shelf in a secret room in my house, and I would do it until I had so many the rooms walls were nothing but potato sized aborted fetuses. Then I would have a kid and when they're bad I would make them sit in the fetus room and remind them of how easy I could have aborted their ass."

Adolf kitler

A cat is lying down, staring into the camera with wide eyes. Above the cat, text reads: "4 years ago I lived in a bush and hunted my own meals. Now I have 2 passive incomes, my own house, & a personal chef. Follow me for more financial advice."

Face mcshooty

A man in a black suit stands in front of blinds. The image contains the text, "On my way to my girl's house after tattooing "Gucci" on my balz because she said she wanted a designer bag for her birthday."

Face mcshooty

A meme with text above a black and white image of a distorted face with wide eyes. The text is a dialogue where one person is trapped with another's sister and asks how to open the door, to which the other replies, "Just bang it really hard."

Unimportant Intelligence

A meme showing an antelope in a field with text that reads "DID YOU KNOW THERE IS A SPECIES OF ANTELOPE CAPABLE OF JUMPING HIGHER THAN THE AVERAGE HOUSE? THIS IS DUE TO ITS POWERFUL HIND LEGS AND THE FACT THAT THE AVERAGE HOUSE CANNOT JUMP."

Adolf Nigler

A screenshot of the Wikipedia page for Goochland, Virginia. It includes a photograph of the Goochland County Courthouse, a map showing the location of Goochland in Virginia, and information about the area's geography and population.

Heroin Monkey

A split image. On the left, a cartoon devil says "MY CHILD WILL comply and allow their house to be searched." On the right is a photo of Jesus, and below him is a doorknob with a grenade attached.

Anonymous

Shitpost-master general

A meme featuring Dr. House with a wall of pill bottles in the background. The text reads: "Slur? I think you'll find I pronounced it very clearly."

Adolf kitler

An orange cat is sitting on the floor in front of a tea bag. The text on the image says: "Some cats bring their humans birds and mice... Oliver brings me tea bags."

DAP ME UP

The image shows a text box with the following text: Prompt: Consider a problem taking place in your community and view it geographically. How does this problem affect your city on... gun violence. Large scale: more people dead. small scale: more housing available. Word Count: 12, Submitted.

Adolf kitler

A black cat with wide eyes and mouth open. Text says: "When you realise it's 4am and you're late for running up and down the hallway."

Adolf kitler

A tabby cat is upside down with its head in a pot, its legs and tail sticking out. The text on the image says, "Can anyone water my cat this weekend?"

Adolf kitler

A group of seven cats are lined up behind a glass door. The text above them says, "I DONT OWN A CAT".

A Star Wars Fan

A two-panel image with the text "There's an owl outside your house waiting for you" at the top. The top panel shows a man looking excited, with the text 'Harry Potter fans' on the left. The bottom panel shows a man crying, with the text 'Duolingo users' on the left.

✨Jassy✨

Like wtf

A cartoon of Princess Sofia wearing a long purple dress with a text overlay saying "This bitch got a wardrobe bigger than my house and she wears the same ass dress everyday" with a skull emoji at the end.

✨Jassy✨

A person wearing a distorted white mask with a black eyes appears to be in pain. The text reads: "When you're chasing someone through the house and stub your toe..."

Pankake

The image is split into two panels. The left panel shows a white bird wearing a red Santa suit and looking to the right with a serious expression. The text reads: "You really gonna scroll past and not say Merry Christmas?". The right panel shows a yellow and orange bird perched on top of a Christmas tree. The text reads: "Because in this house there's only one star".

Why should you care

I haven't seen sunlight in 3 years

The image is divided into two sections. The left side shows a picture of Gollum holding an Amazon box with the text "What my neighbors see as I emerge from my house once a week to get a delivery." The right side shows a picture of Thanos with the text "me pondering cyber monday deals over thanksgiving leftovers."

Adolf kitler

A cat looks up at the camera with wide eyes. The text on the image reads: "4 AM. EVERYONE IS ASLEEP. PERFECT TIME TO RUN FROM ONE END OF THE HOUSE TO THE OTHER AT FULL SPEED AS LOUDLY AS POSSIBLE."

Heroin Monkey

A cartoon shows a man standing atop a large pile of money, holding a sign that says "TAX CUTS." He is yelling "YOU JUST WANT FREE STUFF!!" while pointing at a group of people holding signs that say "Affordable Housing", "Universal Healthcare", and "Affordable College".

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