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A screenshot of a text message conversation. The first message reads, "Why you using tinder?" The second message reads, "My boyfriend died last year so I'm just trying to get back in the dating scene really :)" The third message reads, "Damn thats sad." The fourth message reads, "On our first date we should use a ouija board to get his permission to smash." The final message reads, "What the fuck is wrong with you."

I would be making Eli fucking rich

A luxurious house is visible. The text says "Me if carrying bro on the game was a full time job."

A bright yellow frog swims in water. The frog is seen from the side with its arms sticking out of the water. Text overlayed on the image says "FUCK". Comments under the image say "Aw, come on, that's merely a fuckling" and "could be a dog".

A dark image with a streak of light that leads to an exploding shape. The text "The alien colonizing ship heading towards earth being annihilated after getting hit by a manhole cover traveling at Mach fuck" is at the top of the image.

Fuck teslas

The image shows two panels. The top panel shows a Tesla Cybertruck towing a jet engine. The text above the panel says, "Tesla showing off their $100,000 Cybertruck towing a jet engine". The bottom panel shows a 1972 Chevy truck towing an airplane. The text above the panel says, "A $2,500 Chevy in 1972...". There is a visible part of the word "American" on the plane.

Fuck Teslas

The image shows a Tesla truck with oversized off-road tires. Text above the image reads "***Tesla's new truck arrives in Florida*** 30 seconds later:" Text on the side of the truck reads "Salt Life" and "FLO GROWN".

FUCKING ELI BRUUUU

The image shows a man with a sad expression. The text over his face reads "When someone beats me at something I thought I was actually good at."

FUCK YEA

The image shows a text about the life and work of Niels Bohr, a physicist. The text discusses his impact on physics, his theories, and his role in history.

A text post that says: "We live in an age where you can press a button and a deep web hitman shows up at your door and kills you. Technology is incredible." Followed by two comments: "what button", and "what fucking button".

The image shows three panels. In the first panel, an airline employee tells a passenger "You're too late, sir." In the second panel, Gandalf is standing in an airport, saying, "A wizard is never late, nor is he..." In the third panel, the airline employee replies, "Look, pal. This is a fucking airport. Your plane's gone."

A text message conversation shows someone asking an "emergency question" about where to keep a baby goat that they impulsively bought. The other person replies with "WHAT THE FUCK. ...this is a joke right?" Then, there is a picture of a baby goat with the caption "This is Billy."

A text message conversation is shown. The first message says, "Yoh bro your girl is cheating on you fool." The reply says, "I'm deaf bro." Another message says, "Sorry my bad." Then there is a sequence of hand sign emojis, and finally, the last message says, "That fucking hoe."

Fucking America my ass, INDIA FOR LIFE!!!! 💩🦶🍲🪔

The image shows a split comparison between vegan food in America and vegan food in India. On the top left are two 'wojak' figures next to two burgers labeled 'vegan'. The text reads: 'Here's a vegan meal that tastes like meat using the power of chemicals and preservatives.' On the top right the figure is shocked and says, 'WOW, it tastes like just like meat, and no animals where harmed!' On the bottom left are two turban-wearing characters next to two bowls of what appears to be Indian curry. The text reads: 'Using the powers of spices and herbs, we made this meal taste great, even with out the use of meat.' On the bottom right is another turban-wearing character that says, 'Thank you for this meal'.

A screenshot of a chat conversation on Chat Avenue shows one person accidentally saying "Ur so hot i would let u cheat on me" due to autocorrect. They then say "Woahhh wtf I just meant to say hey" and "Autocorrect fucking with me".

FEBRUARY
Saturday
Right, I know it's been a while since I wrote in this,
but a whole lot has happened so let me fill you in on
everything.
Manny Heffley is the personification of human sin. Do
you wanna know the reason he tried to get me killed?
DATS FOWR NAWT
TEACHING ME HOW
TWO TIE MY SHOES,
YOU FUCKING PLOOPY.
I'M ONWEE
THWEE, BUBBY!
HEWP ME TIE MY
GAWDDAYUM
SHOES.
So I punted that little shit into the wall..
I should have paid more attention to Miom though, because
she actually stuck by her word for once. She managed to
shoot me in both legs and break i
my.
fucking kneecaps.
11

DAD IS FUCKING DEAD. HE SHOT HIMSELF.
Rodrick and I heard a bang come from the basement, and
the first thing we see is DAD ON THE FLOOR WITH
A BULLET IN HIS FUCKING HEAD. When Mom
turned around, I tell she looked batshit crazy. She
was
you
holding a glock and looked like a fucking animal.
I'M GONNA
BREAK YOUR
FUCKING
LEGS GREG
WHAT THE
HELL?!
She then threatened us for answers for who told Dad,
and when I thought things couldn't get any i
BUBBY
DID IT!
worse...
HE had to fuck shit up.
10

The image shows a page from a diary with hand-written text and a small drawing of a person on a couch looking dejected.

It's like 5:00pm, and Mom is driving me home as we
speak. I can't fucking believe that my mother is a
whore. I witnessed my own mother pleasing another man
and I feel disgusting.
During the ride, we didn't speak to each other for
about 30 minutes. All of a sudden, Mom asked if I
could forget everything that happened today. I said I
would, but I knew that this hoe could not step another
foot into this household.
GREG, LISTEN.
HOW ABOUT
WE FORGET
ABOUT WHAT
HAPPENED
TODAY?
YEAH, SURE.
WHATEVER.
@gabriel
She then asked me not to tell Dad about this. I said
I wouldn't, but you can't make a promise to a hoe who
breaks her wedding vows.

MOM WHAT
THE FUCK!?
HOLY SHIT,
IT'S GREG!
MOM was GIVING HER WHOLE HEAD to Mr.
Winsky, and Vice Principal Roy is FUCKING DEAD!
As soon as I walked in these fuckers immediately acted
like they weren't just fucking crawling over each other.
That filthy homewrecker Mr. Winsky sent Mom and told
her to take me home. Fucking delinquents.
I have to tell Dad that Mom is a whore somehow. This
bitch needs to be sent to the streets.
3

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