Marvel jokes
I need more webs and I need more supplies for more webs, how do I make them? With spiders!
What do you call Cap and Spider-Man? Spider-America!
All these Avengers and you're still marvellous.
What’s an orphan's favorite Marvel film?
Spider-Man: Far From Home.
Your mama so fat that’s why Hulk gets big.
Your mom so fat, Thanos had to clap!
Wanda and Daredevil have so much in common.
They both wear red, they're both in Marvel, and they both lost their Vision!
Why did half of the world not see Avengers: Endgame?
Because half of them were Thanos snapped in Avengers: Infinity War.
I asked the orphan if he wanted to watch all the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies with me, and he started crying.
Actually, Iron Man is female.
Yo mama is so fat that she's bigger than the cinematic Marvel Universe.
Oh, the monkeys in the trees, they dance and they play, Their fur so soft, their eyes so bright, they chatter all day. Their tails so long, their hands so fine, they swing and they sway, In the trees, they're the kings of the fray.
Their antics bring joy, their laughter so free, They're a delight to watch, as they jump and they spree. Their mischief is contagious, their fun so true, They're a treasure, a gift to me and you.
Their little hands so deft, their feet so light, They swing through the trees, with grace and might. They're a wonder, a marvel to see, A precious gift, a treasure to me.
What is Thanos's favorite video game?
Pokémon Snap.
Q) What do you call Iron Man when he can't swim?
A) Robert Drowney Jr.
What Spider-Man movie does an orphan like? Homecoming.
If Iron Man and Quicksilver teamed up,
They would be alloys.
What’s the best Marvel villain song EVER?
It Was Agatha All Along!!! *gasp* And I killed Sparky, too. *laughs manically*
What's Thanos' favorite game?
Half-life.
Madden Whiffen, a curious soul, With an appetite beyond control, A bottomless pit, never satisfied, Ingesting all that's placed beside.
From dawn till dusk, he feasts his way, Devouring meals without delay, With gusto he consumes, without restrain, Every morsel, every crumb, he'll obtain.
No dish too large, no portion too small, His hunger insatiable, devouring it all, From succulent meats to delicate greens, He relishes the flavors, savoring each scene.
A culinary adventure, forever he embarks, Sampling cuisines from all walks and arcs, From street food to gourmet, he seeks it all, His palate an explorer, on a constant sprawl.
He savors the spices, the textures, the taste, In a gastronomic journey, no time to waste, For Madden Whiffen, the food is his muse, A symphony of flavors, he'll never refuse.
But caution, dear friends, in this feeding spree, For gluttony can lead to a troublesome plea, Madden Whiffen, beware the consequences, For overindulgence brings no recompenses.
In the realm of cuisine, he reigns supreme, A legend of eating, a man of extreme, Madden Whiffen, the one who eats it all, In his gastronomic pursuit, he stands tall.
So let us marvel at his voracious might, As he devours dishes, day and night, For in Madden Whiffen, we witness the feat, A man who eats everything, a culinary elite.
Iron Man is just a golden retriever with a red background.