why did the toilet paper not make it across the street?cause it got stuck in a pot hole:)

What’s the difference between a nun and a woman in a bath tub? One’s got hope in her soul, the others got soap in her hole.

What did Hellen Keller do when she fell in a hole.

She screamed until her hands got tired.

Why did the moth nibble a hole in the carpet?

He wanted to see a floor show.

Why did the golfer change his pants because he got hole in one

I don’t get why people don’t like my abortion jokes. Do they have a stick up their ass? Wait, that’s the other hole.

Where was Stephan hawking buried

In a black hole 😂😂

You find yourself stuck in a hole with a murderer, a rapist, and a lawyer. You’re armed but you only have 2 bullets left, what do you do?

Shoot the lawyer. Twice.

I went I saw i poop at hole, i make a portal.

A guy sits at a bar in a skyscraper restaurant high above the city. He slams a shot of tequila, goes over to the window and jumps out.

The guy sitting next to him can’t believe what he just saw. He’s more surprised when, 10 minutes later, the same guy walks back into the bar and sits down next to him.

The astonished onlooker asks, “How did you do that? I just saw you jump out the window, and we’re hundreds of feet above the ground!”

The jumper responds by slurring, “Well, I don’t get it either. I slam a shot of tequila, and when I jump out the window, the tequila makes me slow down right before I hit the ground. Watch.” He takes a shot, goes to the window and jumps out.

The other guy runs to the window and watches as the guy falls to just above the sidewalk, slows down and lands softly on his feet. A few minutes later, the jumper walks back into the bar.

The other guy has to try it, too, so he orders a shot of tequila. He slams it and jumps out the window. As he reaches the bottom, he doesn’t slow down at all. SPLAT!

The first guy orders another shot of tequila. The bartender shakes his head. “You’re really an a**hole when you’re drunk, Superman.” I know.

3 nuns are talking and the first nun says, “u would never believe what i discovered.” intrigued, the other to signal her to continue. " i found a phone in the priests room." said the first nun. “oh thats nothing said the second one, i found condoms in one of his drawers.” said the second one. " what did u do with them." said the first nun. pridefully the second nun responds with," i poked holes in all of them." and the third nun says, “oh sh*t…”

Doctor? Can I please have a new butt. My old one has a hole and a crack it it.

My arse hole hurts like no joke man just had to tell that ur heads a peanut u fucking nonce kyd u fat fuck sack ur mum u dirty cow

How do you catch a polar bear? Cut a hole in the ice, put peas around it, when the polar bear goes to take a pea you kick him in the ice hole

3 men go to hell, Satan says if you can question me and I can’t answer you go to heaven. The first man asks if Satan knew how to make computers he goes to hell, the next man asks if he knew how to make furniture he goes too, the third man poke a ton of holes in a bottle cap and farts in the bottle asks Satan where the fart came from. Satan said every possible answer and the man pointed to his butthole and said " nope this one "😂

Sat at a busy intersection with a slice of bread waiting for a traffic jam

Cut a hole in the rug so he could see a dirty floor show

He took hay to bed to feed his nightmare

Took a tape measure to bed to see how long he slept

Put his nose out the window so the wind will blow it

Died with his boots on because he didn’t want to hurt his toes when he kicked the bucket

Whats the difference between anal and oral? Oral makes your day whereas anal makes your (w)hole weak.

stephen hawking didn’t die he got sucked up by the black hole then got sent to the large charger in the sky

why do golfers wear two pairs of pants

because he’ll get a hole in one

Nolan is a mole, who lives in a hole, and then had intercourse with a troll.

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