Hes jokes
I heard that Jimmy Savile never wanted to be famous... All he ever wanted was to settle down, and have kids.
Of course Jesus wasn't a virgin! He obviously liked being nailed!
Why don't you shower with a Pokemon? He might Pikachú.
Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?"
Bob responds, "No, I haven't. Do they call him that because he runs fast?"
Jeff replies, "Nah, they call him that because he doesn't wear pants."
What did the boy with no hands get for his birthday?
I don't know, he hasn't opened it yet.
How many Quebecers does it take to change a lightbulb?
4!
One to hold the bulb, two to turn the chair he's standing on, and one to sing "Alouette, gentille alouette!"
A man comes home and finds his wife in bed with another guy. "What's going on here!?" he exclaims.
The wife replies, "See, I told you he was stupid."
Vladimir Putin is probably a homophobe because he has to go through life with the name of a gay porn star.
There was a man in a wheelchair, and he got knocked out in front of a bus. He had a wheelie good life!
Why can't the blind man see? Because he can't see.
A man with no arms is tasked with a lot of jobs. Then he says to his boss, "I can't handle all of this!"
What do you call Link when he is hurt?
A link to the cast.
Why did the man walk into a bar?
Because he just broke up and he needs alcohol, you dummy!
We asked our teacher many times for an atlas, and he said, "At last, you can have one!"
Why is Trump bad with America? Because he made it scream.
A man woke up from a serious surgery. He screamed, "Doctor! Doctor! I can't feel my legs!" And the doctor replied, "I know. I amputated your arms."
Chuck Norris is...
What? You don't need to know what he is. He's just, Chuck.
There were these three men; their names were Shit, Shut up, and Manners. One day, they were riding in their car, and Shit fell out, so Manners went out to pick Shit up, and Shut up went to the police station.
When he got there, the police officer said, "What's your name, son?" and Shut up said, "Shut up." The officer replies with, "Ummm...excuse me?!" and Shut up said, "Shut up!" and the officer said, "Boy, where are your manners?" and Shut up said, "Round the corner picking up Shit!"
There were once three brothers, Shit, Shut up, and Manners. One day, Shit got hit by a car. Shut up went to find help at the local police station while Manners tried to help Shit.
When Shut up got to the police station he says, "My brother has just been hit by a car."
The policeman replied with, "OK then, first I need to know your name."
"Shut up."
"No, I need to know your name."
"Shut up."
"Excuse me, but where are your manners?"
"Round the corner picking up shit."
When a man sleeps with a lot of women, he's called a stud. When a woman sleeps with a lot of men, she's called your mum.