Hes jokes

Why did the robot cross the road?

Because he was programmed by the chicken!

What did the boy with no hands get for his birthday?

Gloves!

JK, he hasn't opened it yet.

It's funny how Stephen Hawking sounds like Stephen walking or Stephen talking, but he can't do any of those things.

I heard that Jimmy Savile never wanted to be famous... All he ever wanted was to settle down, and have kids.

Kaylee Parker

Of course Jesus wasn't a virgin! He obviously liked being nailed!

Why don't you shower with a Pokemon? He might Pikachú.

Pistacio

Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?"

Bob responds, "No, I haven't. Do they call him that because he runs fast?"

Jeff replies, "Nah, they call him that because he doesn't wear pants."

What did the boy with no hands get for his birthday?

I don't know, he hasn't opened it yet.

How many Quebecers does it take to change a lightbulb?

One to hold the bulb, two to turn the chair he's standing on, and one to sing "Alouette, gentille alouette!"

A man comes home and finds his wife in bed with another guy. "What's going on here!?" he exclaims.

The wife replies, "See, I told you he was stupid."

Vladimir Putin is probably a homophobe because he has to go through life with the name of a gay porn star.

There was a man in a wheelchair, and he got knocked out in front of a bus. He had a wheelie good life!

Why can't the blind man see? Because he can't see.

A man with no arms is tasked with a lot of jobs. Then he says to his boss, "I can't handle all of this!"

What do you call Link when he is hurt?

A link to the cast.

Why did the man walk into a bar?

Because he just broke up and he needs alcohol, you dummy!

We asked our teacher many times for an atlas, and he said, "At last, you can have one!"

Why is Trump bad with America? Because he made it scream.

Ethan

A man woke up from a serious surgery. He screamed, "Doctor! Doctor! I can't feel my legs!" And the doctor replied, "I know. I amputated your arms."