Help Desk jokes

When someone calls you, say this: "Hi, welcome to Dave’s Orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may I help you?"

The suicide hotline didn't even give me advice on how to kill myself. Not helpful at all.

Dear disabled people, just go to the settings and enable it!

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? You slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work.

Customer: "Can I get this in a smaller size and a different color?"

Employee: "Ma'am, this is an adoption agency, you can't do that here!"