I was walking by the gun shop earlier and saw everything was 40% off. I didn't know back to school sales were already starting.
School shooting: Happens.
Foreign Exchange Student: Starts sobbing under desk.
American Student: "First time?"
If a homeschooled kid shoots his parents, does that count as a school shooting?
When the school shooter throws a smoke grenade into the classroom and the autistic kid thinks it's a Disco party. 🕺🕺🕺
What happens when you have a kid with Tourette's and a hair trigger?
The Las Vegas shooting.
I'm gonna blow out your lungs faster than Joe Biden thinks is possible with a 9mm.
What did the priest say during the christening?
"So anyway, I started blasting!"
How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
Give them a Sandy Hook.
What's the only punch that can knock out a 21 year old?
A Sandy Hook.
How many police officers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two: one to change the lightbulb, and the other to open fire while the room is dark.
October 1, 2017 is when the Mandalay Bay became the Mandalay spray. Thank Steve for that.
Why is black mystery not an Airheads flavor? Because we already know what happened to them. *shot fires*
Sandy Hook is my favorite holiday.
