Greek Jokes

in Puns

My poor knowledge of Greek mythology has always been my Achilles’ elbow.



in Country

What do Greek people never want to have on their food? Grease

A young Greek couple got married, and at their wedding… …the mother of the bride took the bride aside for a quick chat.

“My sweet,” she said, “you’re now a woman. I’m so proud. Some advice for you now that you’re married: Greek men are very particular, and at some point when you’re making love to your new husband, he might suggest that you ‘turn around,’ if you know what I mean. If that sort of thing makes you uncomfortable, do not feel pressured to say yes.”

The bride thanked her mother for the advice, and the wedding continued. That night, as she and her husband consummated the marriage, she was mildly surprised to learn that he never asked her to ‘turn around.’

They spent a beautiful week together on their honeymoon and made love many times. But still, to her mild surprise, her husband never asked her to ‘turn around.’

Their one year anniversary arrived, and they made love to celebrate the milestone. But again, to her mild surprise, the husband never asked her to ‘turn around.’ This continued for years: their second anniversary, third, fourth…

Finally, on their fifth anniversary, her husband started getting romantic with her in bed and said, “Honey, we’ve been married for five years. I was thinking we maybe try something new. I thought this time you could ‘turn around,’ if you know what I mean.”

She replied, emphatically,“No! No, I do not do that, I am not that kind of woman!”

Without getting defensive, her husband simply said, “That’s all well and good, honey. But I thought you said you wanted children?”


Hell in Greek Times was known as cold and misty… so now just look at Seattle.


did you know that French fries aren’t from France? There cooked in Greece.


Why don’t gay greek men in greece perform anilingus on each other? because anilingus between two gay men is against the law in greece


Why don’t gay greek men have anal sex with each other in greece? because anal sex between gay men is against the law in greece

in Roman

Why does the Greeks and Romans like food. Because food is good for you.


back in ancient Greece, there was a Greek skyrim, but instead of FUS ROH DAH, the main character said “Me damnit, Ganymede, get the #10 lightning bolt, I hate it when Helios lets his kids drive”

If you don’t get this, look up the story of Phaethon, and if you STILL don’t get it, then you are dumb


I miss school so much