George Washington Jokes

Hillary Clinton is elected president, . . .

and on the first night she spends in the White House, she is visited by the ghost of George Washington. She asks him, "George, what can I do to best serve the United States?"

The ghost of George Washington responds, "Never tell a lie."

She says, "Oh, I don't think I can do that." The next night, she is visited by the ghost of Thomas Jefferson. She asks him, "Thomas, what can I do to best serve the United States?"

The ghost of Thomas Jefferson responds, "Listen to the people."

She says, "Oh, I don't think I can do that."

On the third night, she is visited by the ghost of Abraham Lincoln. She asks him, "Abraham, what can I do to best serve the United States?"

The ghost of Abraham Lincoln responds, "Go see a play."

The last time your hairline connected was when George Washington was born

What do George Washington and a beaver have in common?

They both have eyes

What did George Washington carver had anything to do with gorilla"s? It's a little possible ya dummy

a man dies and goes to heaven he sees a bunch of clocks and asks Jesus what they are for, he replied they are gauges, and that they move when people lie. he said that mother Teresa's has moved twice, Abraham Lincon's once, and George Washington's never. the man asks to see the current president's, and Jesus just laughs and says that Joe Bidden's is the one keeping the hurricane's to speed

Why doesn't George Washington carry his ID? Because he knows he can always ask for a quarter.

IM GEORGE WASHINGTON I CANT SPELL TETH OR AMEiciari

Do you know why no one speaks about George Washington? John Adams turned him into atoms. John Adams was an alien.

Q: If George Washington was alive today, what would he do? A: Scratch mercilessly at the coffin walls, while screaming at the top of his lungs!

Yo mama is so fat, she sat on a quarter and popped a booger out of George Washington's nose.