Gay

Gay Jokes

Rubber

What do bungee jumping and a gay man have in common?

If the rubber breaks, they're in beep shit.

Hot Dog

How do you know when you have been invited to a gay barbecue?

When you are unable to distinguish foot-long hot dogs from long and thick big dicks, regardless of skin color.

Gay Man

How do you stop all homophobic heterosexual white men from using all public men's restrooms at a rest area?

Make sure that all public men's restrooms at the rest area are always occupied with gay men that have long and thick big cocks, regardless of skin color.

Barbecue

Q: How do you know you're at a gay barbecue? A: All the hot dogs taste like shit.

Fruit

How come you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?

It’s hard to be a fruit, when you’re already a vegetable.

Bar

A gay couple walks into a Muslim bar. The tender flares up and says, “let me guess, a little blood on the rocks?”

Canada

Here in Canada, you used to be able to be shipped off to an asylum just because you were gay.

I guess they couldn't tell the fruits from the nuts.

Surgery

My cousin is a surgeon.

Last year he botched a surgery he was doing on a patient who happened to be gay. He's being sued for malpractice for turning a fruit into a vegetable.

Crime

What is a victimless crime in the state of Michigan if you are an able-bodied man who is well-endowed, not white, and not a heterosexual male?

A white male who is heterosexual and physically disabled who is sodomized by an able-bodied and well-endowed gay male who is not white inside the men's locker room at the gym.

LGBTQ

What does the + sign stand for in LGBTQ+?

It’s the premium version of gay.

Gay Guy

How many gay guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just one... But it takes the entire emergency room to take it out.

Birthday

How do you know it’s a gay guy’s birthday?

Depends how hard they blow out the candles.

Light Bulb

How many gays does it take to put in a light bulb?

Only one... but it takes the entire Emergency Room to get it out.