Gay jokes
Q: How do you know you're at a gay barbecue? A: All the hot dogs taste like shit.
How come you never see a gay person in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to be a fruit, when you’re already a vegetable.
A gay couple walks into a Muslim bar. The tender flares up and says, “let me guess, a little blood on the rocks?”
Here in Canada, you used to be able to be shipped off to an asylum just because you were gay.
I guess they couldn't tell the fruits from the nuts.
My cousin is a surgeon.
Last year he botched a surgery he was doing on a patient who happened to be gay. He's being sued for malpractice for turning a fruit into a vegetable.
What is a victimless crime in the state of Michigan if you are an able-bodied man who is well-endowed, not white, and not a heterosexual male?
A white male who is heterosexual and physically disabled who is sodomized by an able-bodied and well-endowed gay male who is not white inside the men's locker room at the gym.
Why were glow-in-the-dark condoms made?
To play Star Wars.
Why did the gay guy say the n word? Cos he's retarded.
What does the + sign stand for in LGBTQ+?
It’s the premium version of gay.
Gay is a mental illness.
You're not thinking straight.
What’s the easiest way for parents to find out if their child is gay Look in the closet
How many gay guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Just one... But it takes the entire emergency room to take it out.
How do you know it’s a gay guy’s birthday?
Depends how hard they blow out the candles.
How many gays does it take to put in a light bulb?
Only one... but it takes the entire Emergency Room to get it out.
What do you call a gay Eskimo?
A snow blower.
Why are most vacuums gay?
They’re always coming out of the closet.
How do you know you’re at a gay church?
Half the congregation is kneeling.
How do you know you had a gay cookout?
All the hotdogs taste like ass.
A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going on a cruise. Who gets there first?
Obviously, the lesbian couple; they got their lickety-split. The gay couple was still packing their shit.
Why do gay men hate periods? Because they per Collins.