Eulogy jokes
What’s the worst thing to do at a funeral?
The corpse.
What's the worst thing to say at a funeral? "Hi guys, welcome to my unboxing video!"
A man dies, and his friend is invited to his funeral.
This friend asks his wife, "Can I say a word?"
"Of course," she says.
The man stands up and says, "Plethora!"
The man's wife says, "Thanks, it means a lot!"
When I die, can someone play "Best Day Ever" during my funeral?
"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing, except at a funeral.
My mom died when we couldn’t remember her blood type. As she died, she kept telling us to “be positive,” but it’s hard without her.
When a military person dies, we shoot all night. When a drunkard dies, we drink all night. When a Christian dies, we pray all night. What if a prostitute dies? What should we do? Please tell me.
Will glass coffins be a success? -- Remains to be seen.