Dream jokes
Johnny is very attached to his parents. He asks to take a shower with her when she gets in. He looks down and asks, "What's that?" The mother replies, "That's my garage." He looks up and asks, "What are those?" The mother responds, "Those are my headlights."
He then goes and takes a shower with his dad. He looks down, "Daddy, what's that?" The dad replies, "That's my car." He goes to sleep that night and wakes up because of a bad dream. He goes and tells his mother and she says, "You can lay with me." He falls fast asleep then wakes up once more because of falling off the bed. He gets back up and gets under the covers. Then he feels the bed moving. He looks under the covers to investigate and sees them going at it. He then yells, "Mommy, turn on you're headlights, Daddy's parking his car in you're garage!" *THUD*
Following your dreams is good... especially since you won’t have to worry about them putting any restraining orders against you.
Why did the plum put sugar under its pillow?
So it could have sweet dreams.
Why didn't the skeleton follow his dreams? He was too gutless.
What did the make-a-wish kid say to the staff? "I don't wanna go to Disneyland, I wanna live longer."
I dreamed I was forced to eat a giant marshmallow, but when I woke up, my pillow was gone!
I had a horrible nightmare yesterday. I was in a room filled with all of my ex's, so I was completely alone.
I had a dream about a car, and I woke up exhausted.
I had a friend who was a deep sleeper. One day, a fire started in his house. Now he's a really deep sleeper.
I had a dream of swimming in an ocean of orange soda. I guess it is just a FANTAsea.
Last night, I had a dream that I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. I guess it was just a Fanta sea!
Why do black people only have nightmares?
Because the last one that had a dream got shot.
Yesterday in my dream I ate a ten pound marshmallow, when I woke up, my pillow was gone.
I had a dream about the whole ocean being filled with orange soda.
Turns out it was a Fanta sea.
A man was having a dream. He dreamt about a mystical creature that was commonly known as the god of toast.
When the man woke up, he turned to tell his wife about the dream. When he delivers the "toast god" punchline, his wife shrugged as she faced the opposite direction to the man.
The man turned around also and started sobbing as he realised his marriage is in shambles.
They used to laugh when I said I wanted to be a comedian.
Well, they're not laughing now!